Guardian
by Fairyfinder
Summary: Infants in Asgard have feasts to commemorate their birth and the parents choose a Guardian to ensure that the growing child is protected and should anything happen to the parents the Guardian steps in and guards the young one. It's an honor to become someone's Guardian and a difficult task to manage, more difficult still is picking someone out for the job. Major fluff!
1. Chapter 1

"Jane, you're an astrophysicist with three degrees who has helped save the world from evil magicky-alien things. Telling your magicky-alien husband that you're going to have a baby is the least scary thing you've done in your life."

"I know, Darcy, I know. But what if he's not happy about it?" Jane sighed to her friend, "Will he care that the baby is going to be half human?" A thought crossed her mind, "What if Odin doesn't approve?! What if he disowns Thor?! What if…?"

"Jane, Thor loves you and you're fully human. Odin already blessed your marriage so why wouldn't he like having a grandkid? Oh my gosh, can you imagine big scary one-eyed Odin bouncing a little baby on his knee? Aww! And Frigga's gonna be so happy when you tell them." Darcy cooed into the phone.

The ridiculous imagination of her best friend made Jane a little less nervous. She tried to picture the royal Asgardian family getting excited about a baby on the way, but the only image she could summon was that of the disapproving glares she'd gotten when Thor had announced their engagement. Sure, he'd won them over eventually and Frigga had even hugged Jane a few times, but there was still quite a bit of tenseness at family gatherings.

The apartment door creaked open from the other room and Jane took a deep breath. "Okay, he's home Darce, I'll call you later."

"He's gonna be so happy!" Darcy sung before hanging up.

"Jane, I've returned!" Thor called from the kitchen. Jane got up from the couch, tried to calm her breathing, and went to talk to him. He was, as usual, loading the toaster with poptarts, "Stark got in trouble with Pepper today."

"Oh?"

Thor pushed the toaster lever down and nodded. "He completely forgot to do something she asked of him before he went on a mission so when we got back to the base Pepper asked if I had received an invitation. I asked what she meant and -Norns! Her cool anger made all of us cower in pity for the Man of Iron!"

Jane smiled a little. "What was he supposed to do?"

Thor held out an envelope to her with both of their names scribbled onto it. "The Starks request our presence at their boy's second birthday celebration."

After examining the invitation to a pirate themed birthday party, Jane nodded. "Of course we'll go. Hard to believe the little guy is already two!"

The toaster popped and the Asgardian eagerly loaded his plate with the pastries. "Indeed. But it also surprises me that there have been no other young ones to arrive yet."

"That's not entirely true…"

"Ah yes, Barton had another child a few months ago, did he not?"

"Gwennie," Jane nodded, "But that wasn't the baby I was thinking of, actually."

"I can think of no other." Thor shrugged.

"Well, there is a baby on the way."

"Who must I offer congratulations to?" Thor asked excitedly, "Pepper or Laura? Or some other person we have acquaintance with? Dr. Cho perhaps?"

"None of the above."

He knit his brow and thought for a moment. No other couples that he knew of came to mind. Romanoff had already informed them all that she wouldn't ever have any children unless they were adopted. Thor could think of no one else.

"Darcy isn't… is she?"

"Not Darcy."

"I can truly think of no one who might have a young one on the way."

"You really can't think of _anyone_ else? Who else on the team is married?"

"Tony and Pepper, Wanda and Vision - but I know it can't be them, Clint and Laura, and Natasha and Bruce are courting. You said it was none of them."

"Who _else_ on the team is married?"

"Us…" Thor said slowly, "Us?" His eyes widened as a smile crept onto Jane's face, "You are…"

"We're going to have a baby."

"Odin's beard!" Thor exclaimed, jumping to his feet and letting his poptarts fall to the carpet. His hands wrapped around her waist and he started to hoist her into the air, thought about the tiny life she was carrying, and hastily put her back down, "I'm to be a father?" He asked incredulously.

"Well, studies have proven that embryo's are living beings, so technically you're already a fath-" She was cut off as he kissed her and then laughed heartily.

"I am a father!" He shouted and then crouched down next to Jane's stomach, "Did you hear that, little one? I am your father! We will have heroic adventures together and be happier than a dwarf in a mine!" A tear formed in the warrior prince's eye and he beamed up at his wife.

"So I take it you're excited?"

"How could I be anything but?" He kissed her again, "Remind me, how long does it take for Midgardian infants to be born? How long until we can welcome the child into the world?"

"I'm already a month and a half in so you'll have to wait about seven and a half months more."

"We must tell everyone! The team, Selvig, Darcy, your parents, my parents - Mother will be elated at the news!" He paused, "And Loki will be shocked, I'm sure."

"He didn't even think we'd last a month together so this _will_ be a bit of a surprise to him."

"We can go to Asgard tomorrow and tell the news. Heimdall already knows, of course, but I'm sure he will want to congratulate us," Thor glanced upward and then grinned, "And when the child is born we shall have her Welcoming Ceremony and choose a Guardian and…"

"A Guardian?"

"It is similar to the Midgardian 'godfather' or 'godmother', I believe," Thor explained, "Infants in Asgard always have glorious feasts to commemorate their birth and the parents choose a Guardian for the child. The Guardian is like a third parent. They ensure that the growing child is protected and should anything happen to the parents the Guardian steps in and, well, guards the young one."

"Who is your Guardian?"

"My mother's sister, Freya, but now that I am grown I do not see much of her."

"And who were you thinking of for our baby?"

"We shall have to discuss it at great length. It is a vastly important decision and we have many qualified friends." Thor said, but Jane could tell he already had someone in mind.

 **A/N: I'm not really sure what this is. I think it's just going to be a bunch of cute short stories about Thor and Jane's baby growing up, and some of their family trials and adventures, but we'll see. :) Thanks for reading! Please follow/favorite/review!**


	2. Chapter 2

As little Cole Stark celebrated his second birthday he could tell the grownups were excited about something. The toddler munched on his cake, getting equal amounts in his hair as in his mouth, and listened. He picked up a few words that he knew. _Baby. Happy. Mother. Father._

It didn't bother Cole that everyone was happy. What bothered him was that everyone was surrounding Uncle Thor and Aunt Jane and no one was paying any attention to him. He calculated that, in the past, the best way to get attention was to either throw a fit or do something adorable.

He attempted the latter by smearing a blob of chocolate frosting all over his face and giggling like it was the best thing in the world. His mommy looked over at him, smiled, and then went back to talking. Perhaps being cute was not enough in this situation.

"We're so excited for you," Pepper said, holding Jane's hand, "Do you have any name ideas yet?"

"Thor doesn't want to find out the gender so we've been brainstorming names for both boys and girls. I really like the name-"

"Mommy!" Cole shrieked as loudly as he could, shoving his plate and sippy cup onto the floor. Screaming at the top of his lungs, Cole noticed that his mother was tiredly coming toward him with a napkin. She swiped the chocolate off of his face and tutted scoldingly.

"Calm down," Pepper pulled him out of his high chair, "What's the matter?"

"Cake." Cole pouted.

"Tony, would you mind getting him another piece of cake?" Pepper sighed.

"No problem Pep," Tony chirped, putting down his own plate and slicing a piece. He rolled his eyes, "He's got a tooth coming in." The billionaire explained.

"Poor guy," Laura Barton sighed, "That's never fun."

"Hey, kiddo, you want some cake?" Tony asked, holding it out to his son.

Cole considered it and decided that if he acted satisfied they'd go back to paying attention to Thor and Jane. Rather than accepting the cake that his daddy was offering, he tipped it so that the chocolate fell into Tony's lap. Then Cole continued crying.

"I think maybe it's nap time." Pepper started carrying him off to his bedroom as the adults waved goodbye. Cole would not be so easily defeated.

"Hugs?" He asked, stopping his tears.

"You want to hug your friends?"

"Hugs." He agreed and then wiggled until Mommy put him down. He immediately ran over and hugged each of the Avengers as they exclaimed over how cute he was and wished him a happy birthday. When he got to Uncle Thor and Aunt Jane he paused. Everyone else was saying nice things to them so maybe he would too.

"'Cited!" He exclaimed, knowing his little voice was more adorable than kittens and bunnies combined, "I'm 'cited for you!"

"Aww!" All of the adults cried, "So sweet. Oh he's going to love having another friend to play with. Oh my gosh, he's just an angel."

Cole accepted the praise and nodded to each adult proudly. He glimpsed his father smirking and his mother rolling her eyes. They knew exactly what he was up to, but that didn't stop him from giving Thor an extra hug and blowing Jane a kiss.

"Okay Cole, time for your nap." His mommy called and he gave one last stunning smile before running off to bed.

The little boy had no idea what he was "'cited" about, but he'd heard something about a new friend, which was always a good thing. If he got enough friends then someday he could have his own Avengers team, just like Daddy. The toddler smiled happily, tummy filled with cake, and drifted off to sleep.

 **A/N: Thank you so, so much to everyone who has followed and favorited so far! It means a lot to me that you are interested in my story! Thanks to everyone who has read this, I'm glad I've entertained you for a few moments!**

 **Please review/follow/favorite! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

"What's the big news?"

"Big news - how did you know, brother?" Thor asked, leaning on the golden force field of the prison cell.

"Jane will visit when she wants advice on how to put up with you and you will visit to play chess or ask for advice on battle strategies, but I never get visits from both of you unless there is something exciting happening." Loki drawled, barely glancing up from his book.

"We wanted to tell you before we tell Odin and Frigga," Jane said, "Since we know how you hate being the last to hear all the news."

"It must not be anything serious then," He finally looked up, "Unless it's something serious that you need less _moral_ help with."

"It is the most joyous of news, brother!" Thor boomed, grinning like a maniac. At the declaration Loki immediately glanced at his sister-in-law's belly.

"When are you due?"

Jane gaped at him for a moment before shaking her head and smiling. "You're never supposed to assume a woman is pregnant."

"I highly doubt the 'most joyous news' is that you've simply gained a few pounds," The dark haired man snorted, "So it must be a baby."

"Very well done, Loki," Thor nodded, "The baby is due in seven months."

"January."

"Now for some news that you didn't see coming." Jane smirked, and to her disappointment Loki went back to reading his book.

"Hmm? Are you getting a dog as well? Moving to Asgard?" He tried to keep the hopeful tone from his voice as he said the second guess aloud. He needn't have worried about the glowing couple picking up on it, they were too enthralled in their surprise.

"Nay, would you care to guess again?"

"If you give me enough guesses I'll be able to figure it out, and I wouldn't want to spoil your surprise."

"We are going to convince Father to let you attend the Welcoming Ceremony."

Loki froze and nearly dropped his book. His gaze shot to his oafish brother and sister-in-law. They held no jest in their features.

"Why would you want _me_ to attend the infant's Welcoming Ceremony? Aren't you afraid I'll cast an evil curse or something?" He asked bitterly.

"Loki, I know you still resent Father and you're not pleased with me either, but we've talked about it and we trust you. You've been a good friend to both of us for the past three years and we want you to be there."

"Thor thinks we can even convince Odin to let you out on probation." Jane added.

"I doubt that will work, but…" He took a deep breath, "Thank you for the gesture. I will be grateful to help welcome my niece or nephew into the realms."

"Ha!" Thor grinned hugely, "If you admit that the baby is your relation then you admit that you are my brother!"

Loki couldn't help but smile a little. "Stark's child thinks of you as an uncle doesn't he? You bear no relation to the lad if memory serves."

"Very well, have it your way." Thor and Jane gave him one more blinding smile before turning to leave the dungeon and inform the king and queen of their grandchild.

"Thank you for the news… brother." Loki called as they left. Thor stopped, looked back, laughed joyfully, and then continued on his way.

When they'd gone Loki tried to settle back into his book and read, but he couldn't grasp the words as his eyes took them in. Finally, he closed the novel and smirked.

"An Uncle."

 **A/N: I hope you enjoyed it! :) Thanks for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4

"My suit is scratchy, Daddy!"

"You should have said so back at home, Cole."

"Why?"

"Because then you could have changed. But now we're all the way in Asgard."

"It's scratchy."

"Welcome to Asgard." A guard greeted, opening a door to the glimmering throne room.

The room was abuzz with music, laughter, and voices. People in every color and style of clothing bunched together but hardly took up any space in the enormous hall. The Starks wandered into the maze of Asgardians to find a small group of humans.

"Look who finally showed up!" Clint joked.

"Sorry we're late," Pepper apologized, straightening Cole's little bowtie, "We haven't missed the ceremony have we?'

"Thor hasn't even shown his face yet so you're fine."

"Oooh…" Tony's eyes followed a tray of sparkling beverages and his wife elbowed him.

"Tony, if you want something to drink I've been told the Midgardian-friendly stuff is on that table over there." Bruce advised.

"I'm here!" Darcy's voice called as she and Selvig struggled through the crowd, "The party can start now!"

"Ms. Lewis, Dr. Selvig, nice to see you." Steve nodded.

"So where is my little Jane and her squishy baby?" The young woman asked, "Has anyone seen the kid yet? Do we even know the gender?"

"Actually, no one is to know the child's name or gender until the ceremony starts. It is how it has always been." A smooth voice cut through their conversation and they all turned to see Loki. Fighting positions were instantly taken up and everyone glared his way.

The trickster was dressed in the usual green and gold - though the helmet was nowhere to be found. His hair was neatly combed back and he wore a small, polite smile. None of the Avengers fell for it and Pepper instantly moved Cole behind her.

"What are you doing out of your cell?" The Captain grunted, wishing very much for his shield.

"Thor and Jane convinced Odin to let me out on probation. One of their terms was that I attend the Welcoming Ceremony for their child."

"How in the world did the man who killed hundreds of people get let out on probation?!"

"Perhaps that incident wasn't entirely my fault to begin with." Loki countered.

Before more could be said on the subject, Thor, Jane, Odin, and Frigga stepped out from behind a curtain and smiled at the crowd. In Jane's arms there was a squirming bundle that made everyone in the audience applaud. As the Avengers glanced over at Loki they saw him tense up under the gaze of Odin. He seemed nervous.

"Asgardians and Midgardians alike, we are filled with joy at having you in our halls to honor and welcome the newest member of the royal family." Odin bellowed across the room. Frigga smiled brightly beside him and Thor and Jane stepped closer to the audience. The new mother looked anxious, but a look to her husband stopped her from shaking.

"Friends, may I present to you my daughter, Princess Tova Darcell Thordottir of Asgard _and_ Midgard." Thor announced, bright as the lightning he wielded and bursting with pride.

"A girl! I knew it!" Darcy exclaimed loud enough for the whole room to hear, which caused a few chuckles. The laughter was quickly followed with: "Hey, Darcell is _my_ full name!"

* * *

The Welcoming Ceremony dragged on through the night and every person in attendance was enjoying the rich food, dancing, and music. The Avengers were having fun, but they were also on edge. Loki tried his best to stay out of their way for Thor's sake. If a fight started then the Asgardian prince would be furious.

"You're creepy." A voice near the trickster's knees commented. When he looked down he saw the Stark child staring up at him.

"You're annoying." Loki replied calmly, starting to step away. The child followed.

"Mommy says you threw Daddy out a window once."

Loki rolled his eyes and tried to get away from the brat, but he easily threaded through the crowd after him.

"My name is Cole and I'm gonna be three soon."

"Cole, if you would be so kind as to leave me alone, I feel your parents would be upset if they found you talking to me. We wouldn't want you to get in trouble."

"Daddy and Mommy are talking to Uncle Thor and looking at the baby."

"Oh?" Loki quirked a brow. He'd yet to see his new niece in person, though Thor had used Jane's cell phone to show him a picture. The fallen prince scanned the room for his brother and spotted him near the front with the Avengers surrounding him. Obviously, this was not the proper time to meet the new princess.

"What's the baby's name?" Cole asked.

"You should have been paying attention earlier if you wanted to know."

"I was!" The boy protested, "But I forgot."

"Her name is Tova."

"That's a stupid name."

Loki stared at the boy. "And 'Cole' isn't? You are named after a black rock mined from the dirt."

"Nu-uh!" His lip jutted out farther than looked humanly possible, "I'm named after somebody that died."

"Not impressed."

"He died in the, uh, the Babble of New York."

Loki paused. "The _Battle_ of New York. What was his full name?"

"Agent."

"That doesn't make any sense. How do you derive 'Cole' from 'agent'?"

"'Loki' rhymes with 'okie dokie'," Cole argued, "I want food." He grabbed the prince's thumb and lead the way to some refreshments. After the pair scarfed down two pastries each they heard some commotion toward the front of the room. It was a few minutes before midnight, which meant it was time for the parents to name a Guardian for the infant.

"What's happening?" Cole asked, chubby fingers swiping a piece of cheese.

"Something important."

"Important means boring. I'm gonna go play."

Loki watched as the Stark boy dashed over to one of the pillars in the room and began attempting to climb it. The fallen prince did his best to ignore the child as he made his way to the front of the room with the rest of the guests. A cradle was between Thor and Jane on a small platform and Odin and Frigga sat high above everyone on the thrones behind the platform. The Avengers were all quite close to the little stage as everyone knew that they were likely candidates for Guardianship. The Warriors Three, Sif, and Darcy Lewis also stood nearby, though Loki doubted the last would be selected since being a warrior was one of the requirements for being a child's Guardian.

"Jane and I would like to thank everyone again for attending this joyful event to aid in our celebration," Thor smiled, "As is customary, we've both prepared a few words to say about the person we've selected to be Tova's as well as any future children's Guardian."

Loki didn't hear the opening words of Thor's speech, but he did catch an irritated whine coming from the pillar he'd left Cole at. A quick glance provided the information that the toddler was engaged in an argument with an Asgardian boy. The Stark parents were enthralled with Thor's speech and paid no mind to their fitful offspring.

With a sigh, Loki stepped over to the tot to see what was wrong. As it turned out, the Asgardian child was mocking Cole's bowtie and yanking it so tightly that the Midgardian was having problems getting words out. Quickly wrenching the bully's hand away and shooting him a glare, Loki managed to free Cole as well as cause the Asgardian brat to wet his pants.

"Don't kill me!"

"Leave my friend alone and I shall think on it." Loki hissed back. The child gave a yelp and scurried off to find his parents. While this short exchange had occurred, Cole Stark had managed to climb part of the pillar to a decorative ledge and was about to fling himself off of it to the floor, two and a half meters below. Loki was about to let him, but wasn't sure just how fragile the people of Earth were. Right as the lad launched himself from the ledge, Loki decided it wouldn't be best to test the durability of Midgardian toddlers.

"Wee!" Cole grinned as he fell into Loki's outstretched arms, "I should do that again!"

"I think not, little Stark."

"Why not?"

"Because I won't catch you again and we wouldn't want to stain the nicely polished floor with your blood, would we?"

The rebuttal to this point was an ejected tongue, crossed arms, and a stomped foot. Then, Cole immediately set out to climb the pillar again. While Loki tried to remove the boy from the unsafe activity, with his probation his only motivation, Thor continued speaking.

"This person has protected me more times than I can count and assisted me whenever I've requested help - and even when I was too stubborn to seek advice…"

An arrow suddenly thunked into the platform floor and the audience cried out as one. Another arrow flew from behind another pillar in the room and a man followed it. All across the throne room unassuming guests drew weapons from various hiding places in their finery. The guests who were _not_ armed, including the Avengers, either swarmed to the sides of the hall or crouched into fighting positions. However, the amount of guests who had come armed was significantly higher and they all wore menacing expressions.

Loki stopped struggling with the Stark boy and hastily searched the room for his brother. Thor had pushed Jane protectively behind him and she was beginning to move toward the cradle to protect her daughter. An arrow was fired and landed within an inch of Jane's fingers, protruding from the cradle's headboard.

"Touch that infant and you'll get an arrow through your eyes before I stab the urchin," A man's voice threatened. The man who'd been firing the arrows stepped onto the platform and was nose to nose with Thor, "In fact, if anyone moves a muscle toward defending this disgusting creature, I'll immediately kill her." He shot a pointed look at the Avengers, who were creeping up behind him, and unsheathed a knife, holding it over the cradle.

"Who dares threaten the Prince of Asgard's family?! Tell me your name!" The thunderer thundered, fury in his eyes.

"You can call me Alger."

Odin had risen from his throne, but he, like the rest of the guests, was not armed. "And what is it, Alger, that you mean to do here? You surely know that threatening the royal family will lead to execution."

"We haven't threatened any royals, now have we?" Alger's eyes glimmered cruelly, "One can hardly say that this Midgardian female is royalty and her brat hasn't had any kind of coronation, has she?"

"State the meaning of this intrusion." Odin ordered.

"I apologize, this will require a bit of a speech," Alger smirked, "The group gathered before you wants to make a statement: Asgard has no business forming alliances with Midgard. We protested Prince Thor's marriage to Jane Foster but no one listened. Midgardians are weak, foolish, and not worthy of connection with the Asgardians. Our peaceful protests have come to nothing - you actually invited _more_ of the scum here!" He gestured to the Avengers, knife still hovering over the infant.

"Wow, realm-ist much?" Stark snorted.

"The people of Asgard have had enough with the simple-minded humans. We'll put an end to any Midgardian that crosses the Rainbow Bridge, and that is an oath. We'll start with the imposter princess and her mother and move down the line to the revolting _Avengers_ ," He scoffed at the name, "If you are Earth's mightiest then it is not surprising that the Jotun weakling failed to stomp you out."

Loki quirked a brow at the insult meant for him. He'd been planning on joining the uproar anyway, but that just sealed the deal. All of the anti-Midgardian rebels were watching the Avengers and other well known warriors, but none had been watching him. He understood the underestimation, he'd been forced to wear a cuff removing all of his magic for the duration of his probation. The second prince had never been known for anything besides magic so how could they know that he was trained as a warrior right alongside with Thor, Sif, and the Warriors Three? The poor fools probably suspected that he would sympathise with them.

As Alger continued his speech about the inferiority of Midgardians and held the knife above the small princess, Loki crept closer to the platform and "borrowed" a knife from one unknowing rebel on the way. Now armed, the trickster quietly made his way to the stage from the side, just out of Alger's line of vision. The knife felt good in his hand. It had been quite sometime since he'd used anything sharper than a fork and he enjoyed the small amount of power he'd gained.

"I have counted only twenty of you," Odin stated to the rebel leader, "You cannot escape from my men even if you accomplish your task. Who will uphold your oath of keeping Midgardians from Asgard?"

Alger smiled, displaying a missing front tooth. "There are many more of us."

"A handful at most," Odin replied, "Or Heimdall would have seen your plotting."

Alger did not reply and instead leaned further over the cradle. Jane unconsciously jerked closer to the baby, causing the rebel to smile at her and lower his knife to Tova's face. A quick flick of the blade was enough to bring a deep line of red across the infant's cheek. Wailing began and the new parents both cried out: Jane in fear and Thor in anger. Alger straightened a bit and made eye contact with Odin before he began to lower the weapon toward the sobbing child. Before he could get close enough to do anymore damage there was a streak of silver and a squeal of pain. The man fell backward with a dagger protruding from his chest and shock on his face. All eyes turned in the direction the knife had come from.

"Sorry about the mess," Loki said, nonchalantly brushing some unseen lint off of his coat, "I thought I'd put an end to his rather unimpressive show."

The remaining rebels in the room glanced from the fallen prince to their dead leader and back again. Many of them had been expecting Loki to aid them. Hadn't he attempted to take over Midgard? Didn't he hate the weaklings as much as they did?

"Oh don't look so surprised," He chided them, "You did try to kill my niece after all."

A few rebels tried to exit the great hall, but by this time Heimdall had gotten a message to the guards of what had been happening and a throng of armed men pulsed into the room and captured every armed party guest while their jaws hung open.

* * *

After the fuss had quieted and it was made sure that everyone was alright, Pepper noticed that she hadn't seen her son since the initial attack. When the rebels broke out she'd immediately run to where her boy was playing and collected him in her arms. She didn't put him down until Alger's body had been cleaned up. Now, nearly an hour later, she couldn't find him in the crowd.

"Tony, have you seen Cole?" She asked, trying to keep the worry from her voice. All of the rebels had been captured and taken to the dungeons, but she was wary of a backup plan.

"I think he was over by the refreshments a few minutes ago." The billionaire replied as he turned from his conversation about better security for the palace.

Pepper darted over to the table that had been set up with treats. She didn't see anyone at first but heard a bit of giggle-filled conversation and peered beneath the tablecloth to find a sight she'd not been expecting. Relief filled the mother as she saw her son, but a new panic formed when she saw who his companion was.

Loki blinked up at her from his cross legged position under the table.

"Mrs. Stark," He nodded, "The boy was just relating the impressive tale of how Queen Elsa and Princess Anna saved their entire kingdom by defeating the evil Prince Hans and bringing back summer."

"Cole," Pepper said hesitantly, eyes never leaving the trickster, "You shouldn't run off like that, especially in a place you don't know very well."

Tony's head peeked under the table and glared at Loki. "Around such questionable company too," He reached under the table and scooped up the boy, "Come on buddy, let's go."

"But I'm not done," Cole mumbled tiredly, "Gotta tell about _Frozen Fever_."

"Some other time."

Cole's eyes began to drift shut and his head rested on his father's shoulder. He'd been up much past his bedtime and had gone through lots of excitement that day. "Good bye, Okie Dokie."

"Farewell, Little Stark." Loki nodded, coming out from under the table and smiling politely. Once Tony had handed over the boy to Pepper he turned to Loki and poked him in the chest, eyes alight.

"Listen up 'Okie Dokie', don't go near my kid again or I'll throw _you_ out a window."

"I didn't go to him, he came to me."

"Oh, so you were just hiding under the table?"

Loki smirked. "I was, in fact. I wasn't sure how Thor would take me killing someone at his daughter's Welcoming Ceremony, and I certainly didn't want to find out."

Stark gave him a curious look. "I guess you couldn't hear much from under that table."

"I was busy listening to a riveting story," Loki shrugged, "Was it Odin or Thor who ordered my execution?"

"Thor made you his kid's Guardian."

"Don't be more of a fool than you already are." Loki laughed, truly amused by the idea. No one, not even his ever-forgiving brother would make _him_ Guardian of a child.

"You don't believe me? Ask Thor yourself, he's been looking for you since you pulled that little hero stunt."

"You've found him!" Thor bellowed happily. He pushed through the guests until he came to Loki and Stark.

"Yeah, he was hiding under the table."

"I wasn't 'hiding', I was formulating a strategy."

Thor grinned and pulled his brother into a bear-hug. After a bone-crushing moment he released him and patted him heartily on the back. "Loki, I owe you much. Today you have saved the life of my daughter and killed a threat to Asgard."

"Well, it seemed like nobody else was doing anything about it." Loki grumbled, rubbing his shoulder where Thor had patted him.

"You have heard the news, haven't you?"

"If it is a continuation of the joke Stark just told me, I'd rather not hear it."

"Joke? What joke?"

"I tried to tell him that you named him as Tova's Guardian but he thought I was kidding." Tony explained.

"It is a statement that bares no hint of jest, brother. Jane and I have discussed it and you are the only one we see fit to make Guardian."

"You had someone in mind before the little skirmish, don't deny them from their honor," Loki argued, hardly believing the words he was hearing. Certainly, long ago he would have believed - even expected- being made Thor's child's Guardian, but much had happened since they were that close. "I believe Volstagg was the best man at your wedding, perhaps he was the one you had in mind."

"Thor, Tova is healing so quickly! It must be the Asgardian blood in her, think of the medical applications of such knowledge!" Jane babbled as she joined the group, infant in her arms, "Oh, hello." She nodded at her brother-in-law and Tony.

"Jane, surely you didn't consent to making _me_ the baby's Guardian." Loki scoffed.

"Of course I did," Jane shrugged, "We'd picked you out before you even killed that crazy guy… you aren't turning us down are you?"

Loki stared at them liked they'd just informed him that the past few years had all just been a strange and horrible dream. After a moment of trying to deduce what in the nine realms they were trying to say, he glanced at the baby and a lump of emotion formed in his throat. He swallowed and met his brother's gaze.

"Explain."

"What is there to explain? You fill the role perfectly. A warrior, a friend, and you've already proven you will go to great lengths to protect Tova," Thor shrugged, "I thought the choice was obvious and Jane agreed."

"But you are telling me that you'd selected me before the ceremony even began?"

"Yes."

Tova gurgled happily from her swaddling and a small hand popped out from the blanket. Staring at the child, Loki fell silent. Was he willing to risk his life to protect her? Was he willing to spend time with her and assist in bringing her up?

"Do you accept this duty?" Thor asked, a hopeful note in his voice.

"I… I accept."

The couple smiled brightly at him and Jane held out the little girl. "Would you like to hold your niece?"

He nodded silently and took the small thing in his arms. She giggled even with the scabbing cut on her cheek and tugged at a strand of his black hair. More laughter poured from her mouth and she smiled brightly at him, blue eyes twinkling.

"Aww! She likes you!" Darcy chirped, inserting herself into the group. Most of the time Loki found Darcy an insufferable creature, more annoying than all of the Avengers put together, but he wasn't even paying attention as he stared at the child.

"She has your eyes, Thor," Loki noted, trying to keep all emotion from his voice, "And Jane's nose."

Thor grinned and wrapped an arm around his wife's shoulders, nodding to his brother. "And the best Guardian a princess could ask for."

 **A/N: Wow! So many favorites and follows in so little time! Thanks you guys! You da-bomb-digity! A real phizzwizard, you is! I hope you enjoyed this chapter and that you are excited to read more!**

 **Please follow/favorite/review! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Thanks so much for the THREE reviews! Wowza! As well as for the favorites and follows! You guys are awesome, as usual. ;)**

 **Also, to Reading-Stories-Only, I'm so glad you got that reference. :D**

 **Thanks for reading, I hope y'all enjoy!**

"It's a dangerous and foolhardy notion!" Odin grumbled as he and Frigga sat alone in their chambers, "What if he kills the child out of spite?!"

"Odin, if you expect the worst from him then that is what you shall receive. If you still don't trust our son then you should not have let him out on probation." Frigga replied.

"He has already made it clear that he is not our son," The king muttered, "And you know if I hadn't put him on this test that Thor would have never forgiven me."

"Calm yourself, Odin. Let's not think of imagined evil when our first grandchild has just had her Welcoming Ceremony."

Odin's eye softened. "Did you see her bright smile?"

"It reminds me of Thor at that age," Frigga chuckled, "It has been so long since I've held a baby."

"Hopefully she will live past infancy."

"Loki is not going to kill her!"

"Well if he doesn't then she will have the most feared Guardian in the nine realms. If another attempt is made on her I doubt there will be any survivors amongst the attackers."

"When he finds something he cares about he is passionate." The queen replied with a smile.

"As if I hadn't seen enough of his passion."

"You know the debacle on Midgard was not entirely of his doing," She reminded him, "He admitted that the Titan, Thanos, had heavy influence on what happened."

Odin sighed and kissed her cheek. "You are too forgiving." They were quiet a moment before he spoke again, "What do you think it will be like? Having grandchildren?"

"I have no idea, but we'll soon find out."

 **A/N: Please follow/favorite/review! :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thanks for all of the favorite/follows/reviews! I'm so glad you're enjoying this! :)**

 **Disclaimer (because I forgot to put it on the first chapter): I do not own the Avengers.**

As Loki wandered the halls of the palace, a stack of books precariously balanced in his hands, he heard four voices he recognized. He looked through a doorframe and spotted the Warriors Three and Sif chatting in a small strategy room. They surrounded the large table and carelessly pushed the soldier representations across a map. It didn't seem as if they were actually working, but instead passing the time idly.

"...on Midgard. It is a pity." Fandral was saying.

"Thor does love the people," Sif commented, "And I suppose Jane's kin have not yet met the child. She will want mothering tips from her parents and there isn't exactly a form of communication between the two realms."

"Still, I hope they visit often." Volstagg said around a bite of food that was in his mouth.

"Jane and Thor are leaving?" Loki asked, stepping into the room. He tried to ignore the disgusted looks they gave him. None of them had ever liked him and when he'd nearly killed Thor they'd begun to openly show their hatred.

"Yes." Hoggun replied.

"When?" Loki shot back irritably. If they weren't hiding their feelings he wouldn't either.

"Oh, so they haven't told the Guardian!" Fandral laughed, "Perhaps they're worried you'll attempt to follow them."

Loki rolled his eyes and shifted the weight of the books in his hands. "You ought to learn to hide your jealousy better, Fandral. You know Thor would have picked Volstagg, Sif, Hoggun, and all of the Avengers before you."

"Instead of all of those highly qualified persons he chose the monster who has betrayed him countless times. Perhaps I am not jealous, I am just confused."

"Nothing new then?" Loki sneered, "I do have things that need my attention so if you won't tell me when my brother is leaving then I shall seek the information elsewhere."

"They are leaving tomorrow," Sif spat at him, "Now leave us to tend to your book keeping."

"As the lady requests." He snickered, turning on his heel and continuing on his way. When he arrived at the royal nursery he went straight to the little bookshelf in the corner and piled the volumes he'd brought on it. He'd brought nearly all of the books he'd favored as a child. Nearly all, as he'd thrown a few books into the fire when he'd gone through his old possessions. These unfortunate volumes had all depicted awful, child snatching, terrifying ice giants committing acts of villainy.

"What have you got there?" Jane asked from behind him.

He'd heard her come in and turned to her with a small smile. "I was going through my bookshelves and was going to throw these fairytales out, but rather than waste them I thought I would bestow them on Tova."

She crouched down next to him and handed him the infant while she browsed the titles. Tova slept peacefully while he stared at her. Throughout the past week he had been handed the baby many times, but it still shocked him that anyone would trust him with their child.

"These are beautiful books," The mother commented, "Were they yours when you were a kid?"

"Yes, unfortunately all of them are in Norse. That was the first language I learned," He stood with Tova in his arms still, "But they have many pictures and I'm sure Thor can translate."

"Did Thor read much when you two were growing up?"

Loki smirked. "No. I read many stories to him, but he only learned to read when I threatened to stop coming to training with him. He sought out our tutor immediately and read me one of these books by that evening."

"That sounds about right. I don't think I've ever seen him pick up a book." Jane laughed. She stood up as well and offered to take the baby back. Loki was reluctant to let the sleeping child go, but handed her back after a moment.

"What is going on in here?" Odin asked, stepping into the room and glaring at everything. He looked very much out of place in the pink tinted room.

"Loki was just dropping off some books for Tova," Jane replied, curtseying as gracefully as she could while holding her daughter, "Can I help you?"

Odin glanced over at his once-son and Loki dropped into a stiff bow. "Am I not allowed to visit my granddaughter without reason?"

"Um, no, that's not what I meant. I mean, do you need something? Err, would you like to hold Tova?"

"Not at this time. I am just checking in," He peered at the child and rubbed his thumb along her cheek, "Her wound has healed well, but it will leave a scar."

"Yep." Jane said awkwardly.

Loki felt like leaving immediately as it seemed like the room was shrinking with every breath and the tension growing so thick he could barely move. When Odin's always disapproving glare found him his hands tightened into fists behind his back. Had his magic not been taken from him he would have glamoured himself to appear calm, but in his current condition his discomfort was painted across his face, he was certain.

"How does it feel being the girl's Guardian?" Odin asked, "I can't say I've ever held that honor myself."

"I am privileged to be a part of her life." Loki commented, teeth still clenched.

"Don't forget that privilege can easily be revoked." With that, the king left the nursery and allowed both Jane and Loki to take an enormous breath of relief.

"He seemed more grumpy than usual." Jane commented, setting Tova in her cradle.

"Oh, I could have made him even angrier if I'd wanted, but being on probation means biting remarks and smugness around the king are strictly forbidden. One false move…"

"And back to the cell?"

"I was thinking I'd be headed for the chopping block this time."

Jane grimaced. "Thor wouldn't let that happen."

"You and Thor will be in Midgard soon and have no say in the matter."

"Well then," She patted his shoulder, "No false moves while we're gone."


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Thank you so, so, so much for the many reviews and follows and favorites I have received! You are awesome people. I'm glad you are enjoying it so far! I hope it stays entertaining! :)**

Swinging open suddenly and with great force, the door to the apartment nearly came off its hinges. Loki took a surprised step back as Thor barreled through the doorframe and pulled him into a hug.

"It has been too long!"

"I'm not sure I'd say that." Loki croaked as he felt his joints crack.

"Come in, come in!" Thor yanked his brother into the apartment and Loki was somewhat shocked by the small living room he was standing in. It was nothing compared to anything Thor had had back in Asgard, but it looked cozy.

Jane darted past them, pulling a shoe onto her foot as she went. "Thor, where did you put Tova's squash?"

"I haven't seen it."

"I thought you were feeding her."

"I was, but there was a knock on the door and…"

"So where did her squash go?"

"I told you I haven't seen it."

"Then what were you feeding her?"

"The applesauce."

"Thor! You know I'm trying to incorporate more veggies in her diet!"

"Apologies, I did not see the squash in the refrigerator. I will search again." Thor headed off to a little kitchen and Loki raised an eyebrow at the chaotic nature of the area. He could hear Tova laughing from the kitchen and Jane was searching under every piece of paper on the coffee table for something while Thor rifled through the fridge.

"Oh! Hi Loki," Jane nodded as she pulled a paper out from the stack, scanned it, and put it back, "You haven't seen an acceptance speech anywhere around here, have you?"

"I can't say that I have. What is all the commotion about?"

"Ah-ha! Found it!" Jane held a scrap of paper high in the air, "I forgot I wrote on a Subway sandwich paper. I wonder if I have time to rewrite it somewhere less greasy."

"You are headed out?" He asked in confusion.

"I forgot you were coming today and I kind of have a thing that I need to - Thor, did you find the squash?"

"Not yet, the speech?"

"Found it! Sorry Loki, I was awarded a plaque for my study on inter-realm travel and there is a dinner I need to go to tonight. Do you mind watching Tova while we're out? The sitter hasn't called me back yet."

"I…"

"Great! I might call Darcy and have her check in to make sure you two are doing all right," The woman grabbed a pencil out of a potted plant and ripped off a piece of paper from a newspaper. She scribbled something on the paper and shoved it into his hands, "That's my parents' number, Pepper's number, my number, Darcy's number, and the number of the building we'll be at. Do you know who to call if there is an emergency?"

"You…?" Loki asked.

"No, I mean, like if someone gets seriously wounded or the house catches on fire or something. Do you know who to call?"

"My answer is unchanged."

"Okay, yeah, I'd like to know, but first you call 911. The landline is on the kitchen counter next to the toaster. You don't have to worry about feeding her because - Thor, have you found the squash yet?"

"Are you certain we have squash?"

"It should be in there. Did you check behind last night's leftovers?"

"I cannot locate it."

"Well, she should be fed by the time we go. I already gave her a bath and she has a fresh diaper at the moment. All you have to do is play with her for a little while and then put her to bed at eight. If Darcy comes it will be at seven thirty."

"Do you really think I should…?"

"You'll do great!" Jane stepped into the kitchen, reached into the fridge and quickly pulled out the squash. Thor stared in wonder.

"By Odin's beard, it was not there a moment ago."

"Just feed her please. I'm going to go look for my earrings. Don't forget Loki, see if he's had anything to eat yet."

Thor looked up at his brother as if he'd forgotten he'd come. "Would you care for some puréed squash?"

"Pass."

* * *

Jane and Thor had been gone for fifteen minutes and the whole time Loki had sat across from Tova's high chair and stared. The one year old stared back. This continued for five more minutes until she scrunched up her face and began screaming. Loki would never admit it, but the sudden weeping caused him to jump a foot in the air.

"What ails you?" He asked, inching closer to her. Fat tears streaked her reddening face and she glared at him, "How am I supposed to know what's wrong? You can't just start crying like that." He scolded.

Tova only wailed louder and hit her hand against the chair. She opened her mouth and shrieked. Loki rolled his eyes, but at the same time he hoped nothing was wrong with her. Babies cried, right? It's what they did. Perhaps there was no reason for it, she was just moody.

"Dow!" Erupted from her mouth, "Dow! Dow!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Dow!"

"Are you actually attempting to communicate or is this nonsense?"

She sniffled a little and pointed at the floor. "Dow."

"So you want down. You should have said so from the start," He grumbled, attempting to lift her from the chair. She was held tight by straps across her lap, "What in the realms?"

"Dow!" Tova screamed again.

"I'm trying! You're fastened in place by something," Loki attempted to pull her out again but the straps held fast, "Fine then, it won't budge. What would you have me do?"

"Dow!"

"Shut up!" He growled, running a hand through his hair, "I'm thinking."

"Down now!"

"Expanding your vocabulary won't help the situation at all."

A pair of safety scissors glinted on the table and he quickly grabbed them. He carefully hacked away at the straps, avoiding the baby herself as well as he could. When the ribbons broke he triumphantly pulled her out of the chair and held her aloft.

"Dow!"

"All right already you irascible little thing." He placed her on the kitchen floor and was shocked at the speed at which she scuttled away from him. She raced into the living room on all fours and headed straight for a pile of shiny toys. Grabbing at a stuffed octopus, Tova watched him warily. She claimed her prize and immediately put one of the eight limbs into her mouth, gnawing on it.

"You are the strangest creature I've encountered."

"To-pus!" Tova exclaimed, holding her toy out for him to see.

"Octopus, yes, they are odd, but you are in a class all by yourself."

She muttered incoherently and continued to play with her stuffed animal. Loki sat on the couch and watch in fascination.

* * *

"Yo, you in here?" Darcy called from the front door. She gasped at the sight she saw before her, "Jane is gonna be so mad."

Loki shrugged. "Things got a little out of hand, but I'm sure we can hide the mess. If you don't tell I won't."

"How the heck are we going to hide _this_? We can't just put it in the trash can and hope no one notices!" She stepped further into the room and glared at the man before her, "What were you thinking?!"

"It's fine. We'll make up some excuse if we have to," His brow furrowed, "The red color might be harder to get out of the carpet."

"Red!" Tova agreed.

"Oh sweety, you are a mess! Come here." Darcy stepped over the puddle of red paint on the floor and scooped up the girl, who immediately put her paint covered hand on Darcy's white shirt.

"We were bored." Loki explained, getting up from the floor and wiping the green paint he'd been using onto a paper towel.

"She's one! She can't fingerpaint yet!" The woman snatched a packet of wet wipes from the kitchen and attempted to get the paint off of her, "Oh my gosh, she's going to need a bath with all this paint on her."

"You do that, I'll tidy up the… collateral damage." Loki gestured to the paint that was staining the carpet and various pieces of furniture.

"You know her bedtime is in half an hour, right? Why would you start painting so close to her bedtime? Now she's all wound up!"

"How was I to know it would put a rift in her schedule? I know nothing of infants!" He argued, throwing his hands in the air, "Perhaps if you'd gotten here earlier we could have prevented it."

"I was at work!"

"Everyone knows you are unemployed, Ms. Lewis. My guess is that you were on a date or some other frivolous venture." Loki sneered.

"What do you know?! It's been a year since you've seen any of us. I got a job a few months ago."

"Oh really? Then where do you work?"

"A computer store."

"You're lying."

"Why does it matter? Right now I need to give Tova a bath, not argue with the God of Annoyingness." Darcy stormed off to the bathroom and Loki heard her turn on the water. He heard her completing a few other tasks but all with anger. She was muttering the whole time.

Sighing, Loki began cleaning up the paint splatters that were spread across the room. When he was finished Darcy and a freshly cleaned Tova came out of the bathroom. Darcy was covered in water and Tova was wrapped in a towel.

"Sorry I yelled at you." The young woman grunted.

"Apology accepted." Loki nodded, taking the baby from her. He brushed past her and took Tova into her bedroom. Setting the girl into a crib, he placed her plush octopus next to her and smiled fondly. She was so sweet and innocent he couldn't help but grin.

"Goodnight Tova!" Darcy whispered loudly from the doorway.

Caught being affectionate, Loki quickly straightened and strode briskly out of the room, flicking the light off as he went. Out of the room, he wandered to the kitchen and began looking through the fridge for something to eat. Jars of baby food were everywhere amongst tupperware and cartons of milk.

"So how long are you sticking around?" Darcy asked, leaning against the counter.

"Until Heimdall pulls me back, I suppose." He grunted, grabbed a plastic container, and pulled off the lid to reveal chicken. He sniffed it and nodded, closing the fridge.

"You don't have a say in it? That sucks for you."

Loki ignored her and found a fork. He sat down, not bothering to reheat the chicken. He began shoveling the food into his mouth so he would have an excuse not to converse. Unfortunately, Darcy could speak enough for the two of them.

"Tova's learned a lot of stuff over the past year. You'll see her try to walk - so cute! And sometime we'll have to show you how she talks to Thor. She always tries to mimick him. One time she even said 'din's bird', ya know, like how Thor always says 'Odin's beard'? I think out of her parents she likes Jane better, but she is always impressed when her dad comes flying through the window. I mean, who wouldn't be proud to have a dad that _flies_? She likes me okay since I'm always here, but I think one of her favorite people is Cap. Oh! And her best friend is Cole, of course. When they are together they do the cutest things. Like, this one time-"

"Does your mouth ever cease moving?" Loki asked, tiredly running his hand through his hair, "Or does it just go until someone knocks you out?"

"Hey! Rude, dude!" She pouted, "Don't you care about what your niece has been up to since you last saw her?"

"Not particularly."

"I can't believe they chose _you_ as her guardian. I know I'm not a warrior, but I've been learning kung-fu and with my taser I think I could do a pretty decent job. Besides, I never tried to take over the world."

Loki slammed his fist on the table. "Enough!" He hissed, "If all you intend to do is pester me then you can leave. I am more than qualified to care for a sleeping infant."

"Touchy!" Darcy snorted, "Better not hit the table like that again or you'll wake Tova up."

Loki tightened his grip on the fork in his hand. He knew he couldn't kill her, but removing someone's tongue didn't kill them. Thor probably wouldn't be pleased, but Loki swore if the girl mentioned his attack on New York one more time he would cut out her tongue with a fork and then make her eat it.

"Look, I can tell you're about to explode. I'll just go watch some TV," She put her hands up peacefully and sat down on the couch, "Hey look at this! They are playing a documentary on the Battle of New York! What a coincidence!"

Loki snapped the metal fork in half.

* * *

"We're home." Jane whispered as she and Thor stepped into the apartment. She saw Darcy on the couch, munching some popcorn. The young woman continued to flip the channels around as she ate. Loki was in the kitchen, attempting to read a book. Irritation was plain on his face and he kept shooting glares at Darcy.

"Welcome back. Tova's in bed."

"Thanks, Darcy," Jane nodded, "How was she?"

"Tova behaved beautifully," Loki commented, "It was the other female in the house that gave problems."

Darcy shrugged, grabbed her jacket and popped up. She gave Jane a quick hug, poked Thor's bicep, and left. Loki scowled after her.

"If she will appear frequently during my time spent here I will find other lodgings."

"What did you say to her?" Thor asked skeptically.

"Me? Why would it be anything I said?"

"Because I know how you are, brother. Did you threaten her?"

"Only in my thoughts. I promise I said nothing to upset her. She and I are simply not compatible." Loki shrugged.

"It's fine. I'm sure Darcy will stay away while you're here." Jane said, taking off her heeled shoes and walking toward Tova's room to check on the child.

"I apologize for the hasty exit when you first arrived," Thor stated, sitting down at the table next to his brother, "How have you been this past year? Has Father let you off probation?"

"I have been…" He searched for the right word. He couldn't flat out tell his brother that he was lonely, but that's how he'd felt for the past twelve months. No one in Asgard liked him, with the exception of Frigga, and the ones who didn't care about what he'd done were irksome people, "Solitary. I'm still on probation and not allowed to leave the palace."

"Is there any idea of when you will gain more privileges?"

"It could be centuries, Thor. If Odin let's me off too easily then the people will think he is showing favoritism because I am his… I was a prince."

"At least he allowed you this visit. We shall make the most of it."

"What exactly are we supposed to be doing?"

Thor smiled and looked fondly toward his daughter's room. "You are her Guardian. I want you to get to know her."

Loki couldn't help but smile a little as well. If that was all this visit entailed then he figured he could even put up with Darcy. He was very much looking forward to spending time with his niece.


	8. Chapter 8

Tova was immensely busy playing with her stuffed octopus, which she had privately named "Cheese", when she noticed that there was something on the sofa. Her current location was in a playpen in the corner of the living room and from this spot she could see nearly everything that was going on in the apartment. Everything except the thing on the couch. All she could make out was a large, mostly green, shape covered in a fraying blanket. Every now and then the green thing would make a snorting sound or gasp.

Curiosity getting the better of her, Tova pulled herself up so that she could look over the edge of the playpen. As she teetered there, one hand holding her toy and the other gripping the pen rim, she got a better look at the creature on the couch. Her new vantage point proved that it was actually a person of some sort, though the toddler could not make out whether it was a person like daddy or a person like mommy as all she could see was the back of the head and that was very hairy. This meant nothing in determining the gender as both her parents had quite a lot of hair.

In a shocking move, the person groaned slightly and rolled over. Its face was to her now and she concluded that, though it was beardless, it was male. Tova blinked in surprise as the man opened his eyes and looked at her. His lips curved up and he began to get off of the couch.

"A good morning to you." The man greeted. Tova stuffed one of the legs of her octopus in her mouth in reply.

"Ah! You awake!" Daddy's voice declared from the kitchen, "Would you care for some cereal? We have Frosted Flakes, Cheerios, and Raisin Bran."

"Frosted flakes of what? And what is meant by 'frosted'?"

"I've no idea, but they are Jane's favorite," Daddy told the man in green, "I prefer the Raisin Bran and Tova likes Cheerios."

Hearing her name, Tova decided to show off her speaking abilities and removed the octopus from her mouth to allow a clear pronunciation. "Rios!"

"She is quite eloquent for one so young." The green man noted, stepping close to her and looking her over. She gnawed on her toy some more.

"Indeed!" Daddy laughed, taking the one step from the kitchen to the living room and ruffling her fuzzy blonde hair gently.

"Did I oversleep?"

"Not at all! I've nothing particular planned for the day so we may do whatever you wish… provided it is both legal and safe for us to take Tova to."

"The Avengers do not need your help?"

"They will alert me if they do."

Both of the men went into the kitchen and began munching on bowls of cereal. Tova had her breakfast already, but disliked the distance between herself and the visitor. She wanted to know more about him. She vaguely recalled that this was the person who had helped her finger paint last night, but beyond that she knew nothing. Desiring to get a closer look she left out a scream. Daddy smiled at her and retrieved her, placing her in her highchair. At such close proximity to the stranger she could make out that he was, indeed, her accomplice from last night - also that he smelled funny.

"We could go to a park, it is lovely weather today."

"We could do that." The stranger agreed, examining Tova closely.

"Or perhaps the library," Daddy smirked, "I know that it would be your prefered haunt."

"What could a baby possibly do at a library?"

"They have a special storytime for children between the ages of just being born and four years old. Stark often takes his son."

"If there is a chance that we would encounter Tony Stark then I'd prefer not to."

The name the two kept saying sounded familiar in Tova's little ears. Somehow she knew that it meant she would see her friend, Cole. Cole was older than her and always getting impatient when she tried to talk to him since she was new at the whole verbal communication thing, but he was her best friend. Well, he was the only one she ever heard the word "friend" associated with so she assumed he was her best friend. If Daddy and the green guy were discussing her best friend they she decided that she'd better alert them that she thought they should see him.

Her plan was to say the name they'd been saying, however, the "sss" sound was a hard one for her at the moment and the "arr" sound was near impossible. She tried her best but it only came out sounding like gibberish. Thinking back to other words they'd been using she tried another with more letters that she could get her tongue around.

"Why-bwawy."

"Norns!" The man in green exclaimed, smiling brightly, "It almost sounds as if she is attempting to say-"

"Why-bwawy!" Tova shrieked at him to get her point across and he glanced at Daddy.

"If the girl wants to go that badly then by all means let us make haste to the library."

"I thought you said-"

"Thor, somehow your daughter is a genius - despite her paternal genes - and she wishes to go to a place of learning. If I can help someone in the Odison line to actually pick up a book then I will put up with all the Avengers if I must!" The man in green took her out of her highchair and held her so he could look in her eyes, "Let us hope you take after your grandmother in your thirst for wisdom, princess."

Tova didn't know what any of that meant but she picked up on the fact that they were going somewhere. Hopefully the same place Cole was at. To show her approval of this plan, she clapped her hands together and smiled. Daddy grinned and the man in green smirked.

"Then we are off to the 'why-bwawy'!" Daddy declared, hoisting his spoon in triumph.

"Why-bwawy!" Tova shot her hand into the air, mimicking her father.

The man in green shrugged and pumped his fist above his head as well. "Why-bwawy!"

 **A/N: Maybe you are wondering why I haven't written anything in a while. So, my computer broke. And apparently the place we sent it to be fixed had a policy that if they can't fix it they send it off to be destroyed. Guess what happened to my computer! That was a while ago and I requested the hard drive be returned so that I could get my pictures and stories off, but to collect the information on your computer apparently costs $300. So they gave us the amount of money that my old computer (RIP Bertha) cost and I purchased a new computer (welcome to the family Natasha, yes I name my computers and yes, my new computer is named after Black Widow). That's why I haven't been writing. It's been since July since I've been able to write and my brain is practically exploding with unwritten stories. Hopefully that means I will get a lot written in the coming weeks. Thanks so much for being patient and for your stellar reviews. You guys are awesome. :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thank you Anna10473 for your review and to anyone else who read my last chapter! I hope you enjoyed it! Here is the rest of the "why-bwawy" plot (ha, plot, yeah right). Just so everyone knows, this whole story is total fluff and that's pretty much all you're going to get from it. So if you are looking for a action filled story you are in the wrong place. :) Without further ado, here is the next chapter of Guardian. Enjoy!**

As it turned out, Cole and Tony Stark were not at the library, a fact which was greatly disappointing to Tova. She soon forgot about her absent friend, however, after the scheduled story time.

The baby story time itself was a tad awkward for everyone involved. The various mothers and fathers who'd brought their infants to read with weren't concerned about an Avenger being there - after all, Thor and Tova were regulars - but the fact that the man who'd tried to destroy New York was there provided some interesting topics of conversation. The librarian seemed peeved, not by the Asgardians, but by the fact that everyone was more interested in alien invasions than _The Very Hungry Caterpillar_. When it came to song time and no one was singing _Row, Row, Row Your Boat_ because of all the distractions, the librarian irritably skipped _Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star_ and _John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt_ to go right to _The Goodbye Song._

Storytime was interesting, but the real fun began when the man in green took Tova to the children's section and began going through books with her. Daddy was watching from a cushy chair in the corner as the two of them began going through various picture books.

Tova got too excited to let the green man choose all the books so she began to take some off the shelves as well. She yanked out one with a picture of a dog on it and pointed.

"Puppy!"

"That is indeed a puppy," The green man confirmed, "Would you like to check this one out too?"

"Puppy!"

"I shall take that as an affirmative answer. How about this one? It's about a spider who tries to trick a fly into-"

"Ew!" Tova pointed at the spider and when the green man wasn't looking, she took it out of their pile of books and shoved it under an armchair. She hated spiders. To replace the hidden one, she pulled the first book off the shelf that she could find. It was about a whale in a swimming pool and looked highly entertaining.

"No, that'll never do. Can't you see how preposterous an idea that is? Such a large creature would never, in actuality, fit into such a small body of water. Might as well put that one back, Tova."

But Tova didn't want to put the book about the whale back. She was quite fond of sea creatures and bright colors, both of which were featured in this story. Her little fingers clung to the book as the man in green attempted to take it and put it on the shelf.

"No!" She shouted at him.

"But it's immensely idiotic!"

"Mine!" Tova shrilled, gripping the book tighter and glaring at who she'd thought might be a new friend.

"Ssshhh!" A librarian called over a bookshelf.

Lowering his voice to a whisper, the man in green gently released the book and shrugged. "Very well, if you wish to fill your head with pointless stories then who am I to stop you?"

"Mine." Tova repeated, hugging the book to her chest to make sure he got the message. Once she was certain he wasn't going to take it from her she carefully placed it on their enormous stack of picture books.

"Can we get even one book that I'd like?" Green man asked. Tova noted that he sounded annoyed and to make up for it she went and grabbed a book that was all green, obviously his favorite color, and handed it to him. She wasn't sure if he understood her intentions or not, but he smiled a little and ruffled her hair.

"Gweeee." Tova tapped the book and then pointed at him.

"This is a book about grass," He noted, "But at least it's not as ridiculous as the whale one." He added it to the pile, which was bigger than Tova at this point, picked up the stack with one hand and held her hand with the other. They walked over to where Daddy was and the green man informed him that they were ready to go.

* * *

Back at home they ate some lunch and then Tova waddled over to the pile of books they'd left on the couch. She grabbed the green one first to appease her new friend and waddled right back to the kitchen table where Daddy and Green were still chatting.

"The Warriors Three and Sif have been insufferable since you left," Green was saying, "It seems they have nothing to do all day but to torment me. You'd think Odin would send them on a mission or to do something useful."

"And how are Mother and Father?"

"Both well. Mother hopes I will convince you to visit soon. She complains daily that she only has one grandchild and that she never gets to see her."

"Book!" Tova demanded, bored of whatever they were discussing. Plopping the book in Green's lap, she stared at him until he turned and looked at Daddy.

"I think she'd like to read."

"Luncheon and then a story! Fantastic!" Daddy exclaimed, standing and lifting Tova into his huge arms. He sat down on the couch with her, "By all means, brother, read to us!"

Green raised an eyebrow and then sat down, opening the book to page one. "'The grass is alive,'" He read, "'It lives like you and me. It eats and drinks too. Would you like to know how?'" Green paused, "Well this is insipid, isn't it?"

Daddy frowned. "Skip ahead, maybe it will get better."

Flipping through the pages, the green man stopped at a picture of a cow and started reading again. "'Cows eat grass, they chew and chew and chew and chew and chew and,'" He turned the page again, "'Chew and chew it.'"

"Chew." Tova noted.

"Boring."

"Rather dull." Daddy agreed.

"I thank you for the effort, Tova, but this is simply too mundane to read aloud. If anything we should burn it - but I could never do that to a book."

"Let's read something else," Daddy suggested, grabbing three other books off the pile, "Then it's Tova's nap time."

As they went through the books they found that some were quite interesting and inventive, some were cute, and some were more boring than the book on grass. They didn't stop reading until they'd made it almost to the end of the pile. The last book was the one Tova had picked out about the whale. She clapped her hands as she recognized it and excitedly stuffed two of her octopus' legs in her mouth, unable to contain herself.

" _The Whale in My Swimming Pool_ ," Green read as he glared at the cover, "By Joyce Wan."

"Whale!" Tova pointed to make sure they understood what a wonderful creature the whale was and how spectacularly privileged they were to get to read about one. Both men seemed less enthusiastic about the book than she was, but when they'd finished they seemed pleased with the story. Tova was elated and decided that this was the most masterful piece of literature on the planet and ought to be read every day as enforced by the law. Of course, she was only one and could not convey these feelings to Daddy so he picked her up and tucked her in bed. It was most outputting for the toddler, but she was determined to read the book again and again.

Once Daddy had closed the curtains in her room and left, Tova immediately began pulling at the bars of her crib. They were wooden and easily snapped. There was now a hole big enough for her to fit through, so she climbed out as carefully as she could, and padded out to the living room. Daddy and Green were talking again - how droll of them - and paid no mind as she slipped into the living room and snatched up the book about the whale and toddled over to place it on Daddy's lap.

"Tova? How did you get out of bed?"

"Whale."

"It seems you have an escape artist on your hands." Green commented.

"I'm sure I just forgot to put the latch on the bars or something," Daddy shrugged, picking her up and carrying her back to her room, "Odin's beard! Loki come see this!"

Green appeared next to them and stared at the broken crib. "Norns."

"Whale." Tova repeated, holding the book aloft.

"What could have done this? The bars were fine when I left the room."

"Obviously she's inherited some of your strength."

"Whale!"

"But why would she do something like this? She's never minded nap time before!"

"Perhaps-"

"Whaaaaaaaaale!" Tova hit Daddy's face with the book and when he didn't respond she threw it at Green.

"Tova!" Green snapped, catching the book and staring at her in bewilderment.

"Well, she can sleep in the playpen until I fix it." Daddy shrugged.

"Whale!" She was pleading with Green to understand what she meant. He looked down at the book and back at her and nodded.

"Wait, before she naps, I think she wants to read this again."

"Nonsense! She probably didn't even understand it the first time."

"Then why is she screaming 'whale'?"

Daddy looked at her. "Do you want to read the book again."

She nodded vigorously. "Whale! Whale! Whaaale!"

"Oh."

"Very well, I shall read it once more," Green declared, taking her from Daddy and placing her in the playpen. He sat down next to the pen and handed her the octopus that she'd dropped in her escape from the crib, "But only once more and then you shall have to sleep."

Tova didn't care. She just wanted to hear it again. And again. And again. By the twelfth time reading it Daddy had fallen asleep in the dim room and Green appeared to be drifting off as well. There was the sound of the front door opening and Mommy coming home. She entered the nursery to find Tova wide awake, Thor snoozing, and Loki mumbling the words of the story as his eyes fell closed.

"Well I guess I won't ask them to put you down for your nap again," Mommy looked at the broken crib, "You seem to have outwitted them."

Tova smiled brightly, nodded, and then promptly fell asleep. Mommy laughed, kicked off her shoes, and curled up next to Daddy.


	10. Chapter 10

"I can't believe they're letting him stay at their apartment." Tony commented to Bruce.

"Well, would you rather have him stay at the Tower?" Bruce replied with a smirk.

"Don't even suggest it!"

"So if you're so worried about him doing something, why did you tell Thor he could come?"

Both men glanced over at the two Asgardians at the barbeque. Thor was busy scarfing down three hot dogs while Jane rolled her eyes. Loki was sitting awkwardly on the edge of the picnic table and trying not to make eye contact with anyone.

"I didn't! Thor just brought him along." Tony hissed.

"He's not doing anything."

"Not yet," The billionaire narrowed his eyes as he attempted to flip a burger. The burger fell off the spatula and into the grass, "Oops."

"Hey! What are you doing to those burgers!" Clint yelped, hurdling a lawn chair and shoving his team member out of the way, "You dropped one!"

"Sorry," Tony winced and then shrugged, "I guess there is a reason why I let you do the cooking at these things."

Clint adjusted his "world's greatest father" apron and began turning the burgers carefully. "You have to do these things just right, Stark."

Tony chuckled, shook his head, and began to approach Thor. On the way over to the picnic table he almost tripped over a small group of children.

"C'mon Tova!" Cole shrieked excitedly, "Nate's gonna jump off the swing!"

Tova toddled after, but was going too quickly and fell down. She landed with a thump on her diaper covered bottom and sat there, stunned, for a moment. Gwennie Barton, Clint and Laura's youngest, who was almost four, helped the toddler up and together they ran to the swing set and watched as Nathaniel Barton jumped. Nate was six years old, making him the oldest of the gang, and he was always trying daring things… and then convincing the others to try as well, which resulted in many boo-boos.

"You gotta try!" Nate told Cole.

"I can't swing." Cole replied sadly.

"I'll push you!"

Tony shook his head at their antics and resumed his course to the picnic table. When he got there Jane and Natasha were busy discussing the best type of taser to buy Darcy for her upcoming birthday. Thor was listening to the conversation worriedly and would occasionally suggest they get her a nice pair of shoes instead.

"Guys, you don't want just any taser," Tony interrupted, "You want a Stark Industries Iron Taser - now legal in thirty states and Puerto Rico."

"Iron Taser?" Natasha asked, eyebrow raised.

"Based off some of the very same technology used in the Iron Man suits." He responded proudly.

"Or perhaps we could get Darcy a rabbit!" Thor exclaimed, "You know how she adores small creatures."

"Brother, she isn't going to be tasing you." Loki snorted.

"We cannot be sure of that! It has happened before!" Thor pointed out, grabbing a handful of potato chips and stuffing his mouth to its full capacity.

"I think of everyone here, the most likely to be tasered is Reindeer Games." Tony gestured to Loki and snatched a few chips for himself.

"He speaks truly," Loki replied, attempting to sound friendly, "In the past four days that I have been on Midgard I have been threatened by that woman twenty-two times."

"I'm sure you deserved it." Tony dismissed, going back to endorsing his taser.

Loki rolled his eyes and left the group. He thought about asking Hawkeye for a burger, but seeing the menacing look in his eyes he decided against it. The bored Asgardian considered exploring the Barton farm, but apart from the many archery targets he didn't think there was anything else of much interest. Finally, he decided to join the children at the old wooden play structure.

"Okie dokie!" Cole screamed, launching himself off of the structure and into Loki's arms. The fact that the child even remembered him after their singular meeting made Loki smile.

"Greetings, Little Stark, what are you all doing?"

"This is our castle and we are defending it!" Nate declared sliding down a pole and walking over to them, "You wanna play with us?"

"I'd be honored." Loki set Cole down and looked for his niece. Tova was playing a little farther off in the sandbox. Gwennie was playing with her and they were giggling happily.

"You can be the dragon!" Cole gasped reverently and Loki winced. He'd been expecting to play the villain, but it still stung.

"Yeah! Our dragon who protects the castle and gives us rides!" Nate began climbing Loki with alarming speed. Within seconds he was perched on the man's shoulders, "You're name is… uh…"

"Fart!" Cole shouted. Loki had an inkling that this was not a polite term, but he wasn't aware to the specifics.

"Perhaps something else."

"Nah, Fart is good." Nate agreed.

"What about Nidhogg? That's the name of a real dragon." Loki said, attempting to impress them.

"You are our dragon, Fart," Nate stated, ending the conversation. Cole nodded happily and climbed back into the play structure. Nate kicked in excitement while Loki carried him back over to their fortress, "We must defeat the evil witches."

"Who are they?"

"Gwen and Tova."

"Why are they the witches?"

Cole poked his head out of the fort window. "Cause they're girls and girls are gross."

"Pity," Loki sighed dramatically, "But if that is how the game is played-"

"Why is it a pity?" Nate asked curiously.

"Well you see, girls can be some of the greatest warriors of all. Have you ever heard of the Lady Sif?"

"Nope."

"Ah, well, she is one of the greatest fighters in all of Asgard."

"Even better than Uncle Thor?"

Loki grinned and began whispering. "He'll never admit it, but Sif could beat him easily."

"Really?!" Both boys shrieked incredulously.

"Yes. And of course you know of Agent Romanoff's great skills."

"Who?"

"Sorry, your Aunt Natasha."

"Auntie Nat could beat Thor?" Nate snorted, "Nuh-uh."

"We don't know for they are teammates and have not gotten in a fight so far."

"That's only two girls," The Barton boy pointed out, "The rest are gross and not good fighters like boys."

"Really? What about Wanda?"

"She uses magic. That's cheating."

"I use magic."

"You're a cheater then."

"True," Loki consented, "What about Maria Hill?"

"She's okay, but girls are still stupid."

"Don't say that word or I'll wash your mouth out with soap."

"Stupid, stupid, stupid." Nate stuck out his tongue.

"If you don't trust girls that's your loss. Shall we play?"

"Fart, go attack the witches. We'll watch."

"No."

"You have to, you're our dragon."

"Perhaps I do not wish to be _your_ dragon anymore. I think the girls are making cake out of sand. I'm going to seek employment there." Loki set Nate down and strode over to the sandbox. He crouched by the box and began assisting the girls.

"Fart has betrayed us!" Nate exclaimed angrily.

"They're makin' a castle!" Cole gasped, looking toward the sandbox, "I wanna help! I wanna help!" He dashed over and began sculpting a wall out of sand.

Nate gaped at his friend and former dragon as they helped the enemy create a beautiful castle of sand. The boy stomped his foot and trudged over to his mother. He bowed his head and pouted and then collapsed on her lap.

"Mommy, they aren't letting me play."

Laura looked over to the sandbox and saw Cole, Gwennie, Tova, and Loki playing happily in the sand. After she recovered from the shock of seeing Loki smiling she patted her son's head.

"Did you ask politely?"

"I did! But stupid Loki wanted to play in the dumb sandbox and now Cole's playing in the dumb sandbox."

Nate's older sister snickered. "Guess they don't want to play with _you_."

"Mommy!" Nate shrieked.

"Calm down. Why don't you sit here with me for a while and then go try and play with them again."

"Sitting is boring." He said, climbing onto the bench and faceplanting into the tabletop.

"Daddy will have the food done soon."

"Hey kiddo, what's wrong?" Natasha asked, sitting down next to him and ruffling his hair.

"Go away."

"No can do. I like this seat."

Nate stuck out his tongue. "Go away!"

"Tell me what's up."

"Loki is a dummy."

"Okay, I'm with you so far."

"He was supposed to be my dragon and fight the girls with us, but then he said not to fight the girls and he and Cole went and played in the sandbox!"

"Why don't you go play in the sandbox with them?"

"I don't like them anymore and I don't wanna play with them."

"That's too bad," Natasha shrugged, "I guess that means you have to sit here with me forever."

"Yeah."

"And even worse, I feel like tickling someone."

Nate's eyes widened as her fingers descended on him and began their torturous tickling. He couldn't stop laughing for long enough to even breath. Finally, he managed to get away from the assassin and went running to the sandbox for safety.

"Oh you've returned, have you?" Loki asked, making a flag out of a leaf and a twig and placing it on top of the sandcastle.

"Can I play too?"

"I don't know, there are girls here." The Asgardian warned.

"That's okay. They aren't so bad."

"Then by all means, get to work on that castle wall, it's crumbling and Gwendolyn tells me that if we do not fix it then Pinkie Pie the Pony shall be grievously wounded."

* * *

"You think he's filling their heads with evil plans?" Tony asked Pepper.

"No, I think he's helping them build a sandcastle."

"Pep, you know Loki doesn't like anyone. He's probably doing something nefarious."

"He doesn't like any of us, but he seems to get along with the kids just fine."

Tony crossed his arms as Clint walked over with a tray of hamburgers.

" _Bon Appetit._ " The archer said, placing the platter on the picnic table.

"Clint, you don't trust Loki with our kids do you?"

"Not really, but they're just making a sandcastle," Hawkeye said, "The kids all seem to like him."

"What if he's collecting them to be his minions?"

"Nah," Clint turned toward the sandbox, "Hey! Food's ready!"

There was a brief pause in the giggles of the children and then a stampede as they rushed over to get some food. Loki was last out of the sandbox. He rose and dusted himself off before heading over to the table. The majority of the meat patties had already been swept away and were being eaten. He discovered a small one and put it on a bun with some cheese and a few condiments.

The next challenge was finding a place to sit. The children were all next to their mothers. He smiled slightly when he saw Tova covered in mashed spinach. There was not a seat available for him until Vision rose from his seat at the end of the bench.

"Here, I require no food so you may have my spot." The synthetic man gestured for him to take the spot. Loki hesitated.

"Are you certain?"

"I do not grow tired so there is no need for me to sit." Vision smiled.

Loki sat down with a mumbled "thank you" and began eating. He wasn't particularly fond of Midgardian food, but this wasn't so terrible. Next to him, Wanda levitated the salt shaker over.

"Here." She said, handing it to him.

"How did you know…? Ah yes, your powers."

"I also get a sense that you are very lonely," She commented, looking him up and down, "But that you'd rather be here than Asgard."

Loki shrugged and took a huge bite of his hamburger so he wouldn't have to reply. Wanda said nothing else to him for the rest of the meal. Loki ate in silence and when he was finished he got up and allowed Vision to sit once more.

* * *

When darkness fell the Avengers and their families began to pack up the food they'd brought to the little party and were preparing to leave. Before anyone could go, Tova began shrieking in horror.

Thor and Jane rushed over to where she was playing by the fort and saw her sitting on the ground crying. Neither one of them could comprehend what was wrong with her as she continued to cry even when held in her mother's arms.

Loki had been helping fold all of the lawn chairs when he heard the cry of distress. He dropped the chair and dashed over to Tova, Thor, and Jane. He clenched his fists, preparing to fight anything that could have caused the little girl pain.

"What is it?" He asked, eyes scanning the yard.

"I don't know!" Jane said, bouncing Tova gently, "Sh, sh, it's okay."

Loki noticed that Tova's eyes were focused on a spot on her arm. Suddenly, the spot lit up with a faint yellow glow. Realizing what the problem was, he stepped closer and brushed the lightning bug from Tova's arm into his hands. Her screaming died down and she stared at her uncle. He opened his cupped hands a little and showed her the flashing bug.

"See, nothing to be afraid of, just a little firefly." He released the insect and it flew off, glowing merrily.

"Fireflies!" Nate yelled, running around chasing the multitude of bugs all around the yard. Gwennie and the two older Barton children joined in. Cole squirmed in his father's arms until he was released and then he began catching them as well.

Tova was set down and she carefully approached a lightning bug. The bug's light went out and he got away from her. She watched the other kids in confusion as they caught lights that turned into bugs and then back into lights.

"Do you want to catch some too?" Thor whispered to his daughter.

"Bug."

"Very well! We shall catch these insects of lightning, moreover we shall catch more than everyone else!" This he said a little louder and Tony gave an indignant snort.

"The Starks can catch way more than anyone, right Cole?"

"Yeah!" Cole shouted excitedly, grabbing both his parents' hands and racing with them across the yard to catch fireflies. Thor laughed heartily and picked up Tova.

"Perhaps in your dreams!" Thor called after them, taking Jane's hand and rushing after the bugs, "Come Loki! We must best these Midgardians in the retrieval of the glowing bugs!"

Loki stared at his brother, sister-in-law, and niece. He smirked and raced after them. "Tis true, we shall be the triumphant team!"

"Not if we have anything to say about it!" Clint declared, leading his family in a charge to the pasture where everyone else was going. His children and wife ran along with him and they began snatching the bugs. The other Avengers began to join in on the fun. Sam Wilson didn't join everyone else for a few minutes, first he went into the barn and came back with a mason jar for everyone. Then the competition _really_ got started.

"Hey, if they get their families as teams who do the rest of us get?" Steve laughed, snagging about five bugs at once.

"Oh please, you don't need any help!" Natasha said, grabbing about ten of her own.

"Easy for you to say, you have Banner helping you!"

"No I don't-" She turned and saw that Bruce was in the process of putting the bugs he caught into her jar. He blushed and grinned sheepishly.

"Uh, that's not fair!" Sam announced, "I'll be on your team, Cap."

"Whose team do I get to be on?" Rhodey demanded.

"I thought that was obvious!" Tony replied, "Get over here and help us out!"

"Whoa! Whose team are they on?" Clint asked, watching as Wanda froze the bugs in midair and Vision flew and scooped them up with his jar.

"We are our own team!" Wanda laughed. As the game continued, however, the Scarlet Witch made sure every one of the children had caught at least five insects, though she didn't admit to the fact that the oddly paused fireflies were her doing.

It turned out Vision was quite adept at the hunting as the bugs were attracted to the infinity stone in his head. The person having the most trouble was little Tova, simply because she didn't understand what she was supposed to do. Her parents gladly helped her use her chubby hands to hold a lightning bug. Tova was excited about holding the creature and promptly clapped… with the bug still between her palms.

Cole Stark was excited because for this game he got to ride on his dad's shoulders. When Tony wasn't looking, Pepper stole the boy and put him on her own shoulders. Their family nearly gave up on the bug hunting as it became a game of keep away - using Cole as the object they were keeping away.

The Barton family had home court advantage and, if anyone had bothered to count at the end of the game they would have found this team to be the winners. But they never counted the bugs. Instead they ended up letting them all out at once and watching them fly off over the corn field.

By the end of the evening they were all tired but happy. Tova had fallen asleep while riding on Thor's shoulders so her parents put her in her car seat and summoned Loki over to go. They thanked the Barton's for hosting and then got into the Quinjet that would take them and the other East Coast based Avengers home.

On the flight back Tova wasn't the only one snoozing. Loki began snoring loudly when they were midway through the trip. Thor and Jane chuckled and smiled.

 **A/N: Thanks for reading! :)**


	11. Chapter 11

"Oh crap."

Loki looked up from the picture book he was reading with Tova to see Jane talking on her cellphone. He shrugged and went back to reading.

"I do not like them Sam-I-Am, I do not like green eggs and ham."

"Is she okay? Where is she now?" Jane's voice was becoming more and more panicked. Loki put the book down and watched his sister-in-law as she paced the apartment. Thor was gone on a mission for the day so the big blond was not around to ask what was wrong.

"I'll be there as soon as I can," Jane hung up and turned to Loki, fear evident on her face.

"What is the matter?"

"Darcy was in a car accident. She broke her arm so they took her to the emergency room. I need to go make sure she's okay," Jane looked to Tova, who was chewing on a teething ring, "Could you take Tova to Avengers Tower? I'll call Pepper and see if she can take her to her dance lesson. Or did Pepper have that important CEO thing today? Oh, maybe I should ask Wanda. Or Steve."

"Jane, I can take Tova. It will be no problem."

"But-"

"I know where the studio is, Thor and I took her last week. It will be simple. You need to go help Darcy." Loki did his best to smile reassuringly. He'd been on Midgard for almost a month now and he was beginning to become acquainted with the city. Taking his niece to her dance class would be child's play.

"I don't know," Jane got a text alert and her eyes widened, "Darcy! Okay, Loki take Tova at one. I'll try to be home as soon as we get Darcy sorted. Bye!" She hopped into her shoes and ran out the door.

* * *

While he knew exactly where the dance studio was, Loki was having a hard time getting there. Even though he'd changed into human garb, the bus still refused him service, as well as any cab he came across. He wished he hadn't been wearing the magic inhibiting cuff or he'd alter his appearance so no one would recognize him. Alas, Odin hadn't deemed him rehabilitated enough to allow him to use magic outside of his cell on Asgard.

So the man and the toddler walked to the studio. When they got there they were five minutes late.

Loki grinned sheepishly at the slew of mothers lined up along the back wall of the studio as they watched their children clumsily twirl. One of the moms, a woman with chin length dirty blonde hair and a disgusted frown, stopped texting for long enough to hiss something to the mother next to her. Loki set Tova down with the other toddlers and went to sit as far away from the mothers as he could.

"Why are you late?" A sharp voice asked before he could make it to the plastic folding chair. He turned to find the dance instructor, an angry grey woman, glaring at him.

"I apologize, there was an emergency with Jane's friend and I had to bring Tova today. It's harder than it looks to get her into a tutu."

"If Jane deems it necessary to have the scum of the galaxy bring her daughter to ballet then that it her choice. Do not disrupt the class." The teacher turned to her students and began having them warm up.

Loki was looking intently at the ceiling so he wouldn't have to make conversation with any of the mothers. He intended to stare at the ceiling until the two hour class was over, but unfortunately the blonde mother had to ruin his plans.

"Ugh, look at her, she's clumsy as an ox!" The blonde hissed in her friend's ear. Loki suspected they didn't think he could hear them, but then they didn't know that his hearing was far better than their own.

"Gah, I wish she didn't have to be in the same class as my Stella. She can't be a good influence on the other girls. I don't see why Madame Durand doesn't just move her to a less advanced class."

Loki inwardly scoffed. The girls were already at the lowest class. They were only one and a half and two year olds. The fact that people took this class seriously made him laugh. It was just something for the children to do, it wasn't actually supposed to be instructing them for a ballet career.

" _I_ know why she doesn't kick her out. It's because her father is an Avenger. It's such a shame when it matters more who your parents are than how much skill you have. My Cindy is such a natural and then we have that _Tova_ coming in here and flopping around like a fish."

It hadn't occurred to Loki that they'd been speaking ill of his niece. When he heard the blonde say Tova's name he stopped looking at the ceiling and turned to stare at the two mothers as they continued to jabber away about how poor of a dancer the girl was and how irritated they were at the fact that Madame Durand wouldn't evict her from the class.

"Ten minute break!" The teacher shrilled and the girls and boys all rushed back to their mothers to get juice and animal crackers.

Tova toddled over to Loki happy as could be, totally clueless about the gossiping women. She placed her little hands on his knee and looked up hopefully. He was pleased that he'd remembered her diaper bag, which contained enough snack food to keep Thor satisfied… probably because Thor was usually the one who packed it.

Handing her a handful of crackers and a sippy cup filled with water, he turned once more to observe the blonde mother. She was busy praising her daughter, Cindy very loudly so that all the other children could hear. Loki moved his hand like a puppet to the woman's voice as she bragged and Tova giggled at his antics.

"...so good at this for someone of her age, don't you think?"

"Oh yes!"

"Very skilled!"

"A natural!"

"I think my Milly is very good for her age too."

Cindy's mother shot Milly's mother an amused glance.

"Well, you can certainly see that Milly _tries._ "

The mothers continued to try and praise their daughters but Cindy's mother was the loudest voice and quickly silenced all whom attempted to share the limelight. The way she commanded respect from the other mothers would have been impressive if Loki wasn't feeling like maiming her horribly for calling Tova an ox.

Tova didn't seem to notice anything that was going on around her as she chowed down on her crackers. Her tutu was soon covered in slobbery crumbs. When she'd finished her snack she began to show off some of what she'd learned to her uncle. He applauded her quietly as she spun around and around. Falling down on her bottom after one too many spins, she laughed and clapped.

"You're a bad dancer." A high pitched voice declared.

Loki raised an eyebrow and turned to the articulate two year old who had spoken. He was not surprised to see Cindy in her bright blue ballet gear with her hands on her hips. Her dark blonde ballerina bun glistened with hair spray and her shoes looked as if they pinched. Fingernails covered in pink paint, she pointed at Tova.

"Bad dancer."

Unsure of what was going on, Tova looked from her classmate to her uncle and back again with no change in expression. Loki scowled at the little girl and waved his hand at her, attempting to shoo her as one would a pest.

"Go back to mommy, hmm?"

"Bad!" Cindy smirked and walked - no, sashayed - up to Tova, "My mommy says you are clumsy and dumb."

From there it seemed as if things went in slow motion. Cindy reached a grubby chubby hand out and took firm hold of one of Tova's pony tails, with a squeak of laughter she pulled the hair maliciously and violently. The younger girl's head jerked sideways and hit the dance floor. Loki jumped to his feet, not sure what he intended to do.

Cindy's mother was watching with smug satisfaction. Her heavily glossed lips were grinning like some sort of rich botoxed clown and her long nails drummed on her seat's armrest. She gave a quick burst of horse like laughter.

"Oh! The girls are _so_ cute when they play!"

Loki was about to object when he saw something blue go flying across the room into the mirror. The mirror cracked a little and there was an ear piercing wail of pain and terror. When his vision focused he saw Cindy leaning against the mirror and Tova standing with her hands extended and a cherry colored face.

"Oh my gosh!" Cindy's mom exclaimed, running to her daughter, "Oh my gosh! That girl is a monster! She could have killed my kid!"

"What is going on?!" Madame Durand had reentered the room.

"That _brat_ hurt my precious, sweet, innocent baby!" Cindy's mom declared, leaving her daughter, who seemed perfectly fine, to approach Tova. Her pink claws extended toward the one and a half year old and scraped her nose. "You little disgusting thing!"

"Do not touch her!" Loki snapped, finding it hard to reign in his temper. His first impulse was to fire a bolt of magic at the woman but of course that was impossible. Now he was simply trying to keep himself from threatening her or doing anything that might get him in trouble.

"Stay away from me!" Cindy's mom hissed, "You destroyed this city, I won't let you hurt me! I have pepper spray!"

"I seriously doubt that would help you much if I really did wish you harm." He seethed.

"He says he wishes me harm! Oh my gosh! He's going to kill us all with that monster child at his side! Call the police!"

"That's not what I said!"

"Yes it is!"

"No, it is not. Now tell your repulsive baboon of a daughter to stay away from my niece!"

Cindy had gotten up and was headed for Tova with murder in her eyes. Tova stood firmly, tiny fists clenched. Filled with rage, Cindy screamed and began hitting Tova repeatedly with her sippy cup. Loki snatched away Tova before she could retaliate or be hit any more.

"That hideous alien deserved it! Get that freak away from our kids or I'm calling the cops this instant!" Cindy's mom pulled out her smart phone.

"Let's calm down, I'm sure we can discuss this like civilized-" Loki had been holding his hands palm forward in a gesture of peace. He was secretly wishing he could cast a spell on this loud woman with those palms, but he pretended he meant to calm her down. However, his imagination must have been stronger than he thought because suddenly the angry mother was an angry ox instead and her daughter was a baboon in a very fetching blue tutu.

"Oh Norns," He breathed, looking to wear the magic inhibiting cuff was supposed to be on his wrist. The bracelet was now broken in two and being held by Tova. She beamed up at him and he pinched the bridge of his nose, "Tova, what have we done?"

"Green!" She cooed at him.

"I am sorry for this unseemly display everyone. I will put her back to a human in a moment. Just let me reverse the spell…" He began to do exactly that and had brought Cindy and her mother halfway back into human form before a light beam enveloped him.

As the light passed and Loki could see again he grimaced. It was exactly as he feared. He was in Asgard. Odin and Heimdall were both scowling ferociously at him, and behind them were about twenty guardsmen.

Loki felt borrowing a bit of Midgardian vocabulary would be appropriate in this situation.

"Oh... crap," He put his hands in the air, "Now Odin, I know this looks bad but I swear I can explain."


	12. Chapter 12

"Alo? Is zis Jane Foster?"

"Yes," Jane answered to the voice she knew to be Madame Durand, her daughter's dance teacher, "This is Jane. Is something wrong?"

"You should probably just come to the studio. I'm not sure if I can explain over the phone."

"Is Tova alright? The class was supposed to have ended half an hour ago, right?"

"Tova… Tova is fine. Well, she has a bruise on her arm from where Cindy hit her with a sippy cup, but Cindy has a bigger bruise and a baboon head so… like I said you ought to get down here."

Jane's brow furrowed and she glanced at Darcy, who was a little trippy from the pain medication she had been given. The intern was babbling on about how she wished she were a cat because cats have all the fun. The doctors had told Jane that her friend was fine and Darcy's grandmother was by her side so Jane didn't feel terrible when she all but ran from the hospital.

When she arrived at the dance studio she gasped in horror when she saw from outside that there was an enormous hole in the building where the window to Tova's classroom was supposed to be. Steeling herself for whatever she would find in said classroom, Jane entered the building. Before she could open the door all the way something huge smashed into her and knocked her to the pavement.

When she looked up she almost screamed. One of the other dancer's mothers was standing there with the legs of some sort of cow and downward curving horns growing out of her human temples. Jane slowly scooched away from the other mother and toward the door.

"You!" The hybrid woman snorted, steam actually coming out of her nose, "This is _your_ fault!"

"Now Cheri, calm down," Jane stopped moving, "I'm here to help fix whatever is going on."

"My beautiful daughter is a monkey because of you!"

"Okay, let's talk about this. Did Loki do something?" Jane thought this was the most likely explanation, though she didn't know how it was possible. According to Thor there was no way for Loki to get the cuff off so there should be no way for him to have turned Cheri and Cindy into bizarre half human half animal creatures.

"I'm going to kill him if he ever shows up again!" Cheri bellowed, sounding very cow like. She was momentarily distracted and trotted over to a parked car and began kicking it.

Jane took the opportunity to run inside and up to Madame Durand's classroom. Once inside she found that all of the mothers who normally looked down their noses at her were being questioned by police officers. A disturbing half baboon, half little girl swung from the ballet bar and hooted loudly. The teacher was sitting in a chair and staring at the chaos with blank eyes. The mirror that ran the length of the far wall was cracked. In the middle of everything Tova sat by her diaper bag calmly munching on animal crackers.

Ignoring the rest of the room, the princess' mother ran to her and scooped her up. Tova giggled at her sudden rising off the floor.

"Mommy!"

"Ah, Jane. You've come."

"Madame Durand, what happened?" Jane asked as a police officer approached.

"Eyewitnesses say that your little girl threw the monkey kid into the mirror because her chaperone - the freaking alien who tried to take over the world back in twenty-twelve - told her to and then he escaped after her turned that kid over there into a monkey and her mother into an ox," The officer said, reading off his notepad, "Any insight you could provide would be an enormous help, ma'am."

"Tova would never hurt anyone!"

"Well," One of the dance moms had made her way over, "Cindy provoked her and then Tova was just trying to push her away. I guess she didn't know how strong she was. Then Loki and Cheri started having an argument and he turned them into animals. He said he didn't mean to and started to turn them back into humans, but a huge beam of light came and took him away before he could finish."

"That explains the hole in the roof," Jane noted, glancing up, "But there is no way he could have turned them into animals. See he has to wear this…" And then she saw the broken pieces of the cuff in Tova's diaper bag, "Oh. Okay then."

For all the time Jane had known Loki it had always seemed to her that he was silently planning something. The crafty look in his eyes never seemed to fade, even when he was actually being sincere. It was just astonishing to her that he would have found a way to remove his cuff and then immediately disrupt a ballet class. Surely he had bigger plans than that if this was truly a nefarious plot of his. He would have known that Heimdall would have taken him to Asgard the moment he did something out of line and he would have gone out with a much bigger bang than this.

So either Jane's brother-in-law had some other plan that was currently in motion or this wasn't something that was his fault. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, she felt convinced that it was some sort of misunderstanding.

The only problem now was figuring out what had caused all this chaos.

* * *

"Uh… Thor?"

"Yes Stark?" Thor replied, hitting a large mutated cockroach and sending it into the Nile River with a swing of his hammer. The bugs were more of a workout than a real threat to humanity, but they were disgusting and taking some time to dispatch.

"FRIDAY just alerted me to something going on back in New York. Looks there are alerts in the SHIELD database because there are weird things happening at a place one of us frequents."

"What does that mean, Stark?"

"I'm not really sure, but from what I can gather there is something weird happening at the studio where Tova takes dance lessons," Iron Man flew down and finished off three roaches with one spinning blast, "Oh, and this is new, SHIELD records say there was an energy blast a lot like the Bifrost that hit the same place."

"What in the nine realms?" Thor grunted, destroying another insect, "Is everyone alright?"

"Not sure, that's all I'm finding on it," Tony paused for a moment and then opened his face mask, "But FRIDAY just found that Darcy Lewis was in a car accident this morning."

Thor clenched his fist.

"Something is going on with your family, that's for sure. You want me to wake up Hulk or you good till we finish..." Tony heard a bellow of rage and saw a flash of green, "Oh, or you could go wake up the Hulk. That works too."

"I shall meet you at the Tower for debriefing when I find out what is going on and get it sorted." Thor took off, worry clouding his thoughts.

He had just begun to trust his brother again. Loki could certainly take care of Jane and Tova if the need arose. However, Thor wasn't entirely sure that whatever was happening back in New York wasn't Loki's fault in the first place. Since there were very few details on what was happening, Thor only knew that he needed to get back as soon as he could. So he flew on.

* * *

Thoroughly shackled, gagged, and given another magic inhibiting cuff, Loki was dragged off to the Asgardian throne room where he was tossed onto the floor like a sack of yesterday's garbage. Though he'd seen Odin when he'd first arrived, the king had turned his back with a majestic swish of his cloak and strode off. Loki hadn't even had a chance to explain and now he feared he was to be thrown back in his cell with one quick judging by Odin.

Normally, he would have been fine with that. Afterall, Thor would find him eventually and the truth would get out sooner or later. Then Odin would feel stupid and everything could go back to the way it was. Yes, normally this would be an inconvenience at most, but Loki was currently worried sick that he'd left his niece unattended in a dance studio full of crazy women.

So, he humbled himself to the indignity of squirming in his bonds and shouted muffled words through the metal gag. He made quite the sight on the polished floor, he was sure. The guards hadn't even had the decency to set him up properly and he was wiggling around like a worm on his side.

"Do stop it!" The voice was not one he'd been expecting, "You are making a fool out of yourself!"

Frigga.

His mother sounded close to tears as she strode over to him but her face showed no sign of weakness. Her eyebrows were furrowed deeply in anger and her arms were crossed. A scowl slashed across her pretty face and said scowl was directed at the dark haired man on the floor.

"Mmm! Hmm hmm hmm, mmm, rrrrmm!" Loki said as loudly as he could.

"Your father will be here in a moment and then you can tell me whatever lie you've crafted this time," She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, "Honestly, did you have to try something? You were doing so well!"

"Hmmmmm," He rolled his eyes at her and she clenched her fists.

"We have given you so many second chances that I am not sure I see the point of even addressing you before I sentence you to the dungeon," Odin declared, sweeping regally into the room, "Nor do I see the sense in letting you lie to me with whatever excuses you've come up with. It greatly saddens me to- _stop rolling around on the floor when I am speaking to you_!"

"I believe he has something he wishes to say." Frigga commented.

"Must he get our attention is such a silly way?"

"He must be very desperate indeed to lower himself in such a way."

"Very well," Odin sighed.

Loki stopped moving and Frigga took the gag off.

" _Thank you_!" He snapped, "Odin, do what you will with me, but please send someone to take care of Tova! I was the only one caring for her when you pulled me away; she is too young to be left alone."

"Did you steal the child away from Thor?" Odin asked, stepping closer and tightening his grip on his spear.

"No, Jane had to attend to something so she asked me to take Tova to her dance class. Please, just send someone to make sure she is alright!"

"How do we know that you are not lying?" Frigga asked, worry evident on her face for her only grandchild.

"For Norn's sake! Just ask Heimdall why don't you? He obviously saw what happened so he can vouch for me." Loki was getting more and more worried about Tova and he was beginning to wonder if he could move things along faster by running to the Bifrost and forcing Heimdall to send him back to collect the little girl.

"Heimdall did not have his vision trained on you at the time. He was only alerted to the problem when he became aware that your cuff was off." Odin scoffed.

"Does it matter whether I'm right or not? Your granddaughter is on the line! Do you not care for Thor's offspring?"

" _Do not_ ," Odin snarled, "Question if I care for her. My wonder is why you would think I'd believe that _you_ care about her or her safety. If this is a lie, it is not a very convincing one."

"And while you waste your breath," Loki quieted his voice, making eye contact and practically pleading with the man he once called father, "Wondering why her Guardian would be concerned with what happens to her, she could already have been harmed. Please, Odin, I don't ask this for me, I ask it for Tova. Send someone to ensure her safety."

"I will go," Frigga announced, and without waiting for objection, she kissed Odin on the cheek, squeezed her son's shoulder, and briskly walked off.

"This had best not be a scheme to wound whomever steps out of the Bifrost or-"

"If it was a trap, would I not stop the last person who loves me from walking into it?" Loki asked softly, looking in the direction his mother had just left from.

Odin didn't bother to answer, but instead waved at a guard to take Loki to his cell. The younger man looked ready to protest, but his once-father silenced him with a look.

"Once we know all is well and the queen has returned we will discuss your actions on Midgard and find a fitting punishment."

Loki nodded and allowed himself to be dragged off. He didn't know how long it would take to get this hearing with Odin, but he didn't mind so much now that he knew Tova would be alright.

At this thought he rolled his eyes. He was going soft.

* * *

It was a week before Loki was pulled from his cell - right in the middle of his nap - and hauled into the throne room. He was unceremoniously dropped on the floor at Odin's feet.

Groaning, Loki struggled to his own feet and looked his adoptive father in the eye. Exactly twenty-three scathing remarks came to mind, all of them rude and sarcastic. Exactly zero of those remarks exited his mouth. Instead he kept eye contact until things became quite awkward and Odin finally spoke.

"The queen has returned."

"Glad to hear it."

"She arrived yesterday with Thor, Jane, and Tova accompanying her," Odin's grip tightened on his spear, "All would like to hear your version of the events which transpired in young Tova's dance studio."

"Has it taken them this long to sort everything out?"

"The Midgardian authorities were not soothed by Thor's presence at the scene of the event and many questions ensued. The rest of the Avengers did not make it back from Egypt until yesterday and they vouched for Thor."

"And now I would like the truth, brother." Thor's overloud voice echoed through the chamber as the blond prince strode in. Jane was carrying Tova behind him and Frigga swept in after her. All eyes were focused on Loki.

"You will have it. I have done nothing wrong and will withhold no details." Loki nodded.

"Green!" Tova screamed excitedly. She wiggled in her mother's arms until Jane put her down. The toddler attempted to run to her uncle, but tripped several times on the Asgardian dress she wore. When she finally made it to him she hugged his leg and beamed up at him.

"Well hello, princess!" He smiled back, "Don't you look pretty?"

Rather than respond verbally, she stuffed a handful of her skirt in her mouth and gnawed on it, happily gurgling whatever babble she felt like.

"Explain yourself." Odin ordered, bending down and picking up Tova. She frowned and looked as if she were about to start crying. Loki almost snickered to see the king of Asgard causing a baby to cry. But he contained his amusement and instead calmly explained all that had occurred in the dance studio. When his story was finished Thor, Jane, and Frigga seemed convinced, but Odin was dubious.

"I do not believe that one so small could break your cuff."

Loki raised an eyebrow, but stooped down to where Odin had set Tova on the floor (he'd put her there right after she'd ripped off his eyepatch and put it in her mouth). The trickster held out his chained hands to the toddler and she gleefully took hold of them. She began to yank repeatedly on the chains and finally broke one of the links… and stuck _that_ in her mouth.

"I see."

"Father, I do not believe Loki to be lying. You have not seen how he is with my daughter. He would never put her in harm's way." Thor said.

"If it's anyone's fault it's mine," Jane offered, "I asked him to take her to her lesson because my friend was hurt."

"Come now, Odin, it is obviously not his fault." Frigga added.

"Alright! Alright, I see that now," Odin snapped, "Loki, you may continue your probation, but you will do so here in the palace where incidents shall be less of a problem should they occur."

Thor looked about ready to protest, and Jane with him, but Loki nodded sadly, accepting the decision. His chains were removed fully and he left the room.

It was a better punishment than he'd been expecting, but it still stung. After a month on Midgard, he was rather beginning to enjoy living with his brother and taking care of Tova. Of course, he would never admit this out loud. If he acted like he preferred being on Asgard then there was a small chance that Odin would "punish" him by sentencing him to live on Midgard.

He could only hope.

 **A/N: Oh no! Loki's stuck in Asgard! If only there had been someway to prevent this *author smirks evilly*! It might be a little bit before I update again because... well plot. Anywho, it should be great when we come back. Or terrible. Depending on how you feel about certain things that I don't want to spoil. Lol, spoilers in a fanfiction story, what next?**

 **Anyway, thank you so much for taking time out of your busy lives to read my little story. I greatly appreciate it! :)**


	13. Chapter 13

"Father, you cannot keep him locked in the palace for the rest of his life!"

"I do not intend to."

"Very well, how long do you plan on keeping him here?"

"As long as I feel is necessary to ensure the safety of those around him."

"It has been four years since that _one_ misunderstanding! And he has done nothing of any concern since."

Loki sat quietly outside Odin's study, reading a book, but not actually taking in any of the words on the page. He must have reread this paragraph fifteen times by now. Somehow he'd absorbed that said paragraph was about Midgardian theories of time travel. It was surprising that they were so interested in visiting their past when they'd scarcely begun to prepare for their future. The Mad Titan was no laughing matter and when Thanos wanted something he always got it.

"Four years only? That is not enough to be considered even a slap on the hand for the things he has done." Odin drawled.

"Yes, he let the Jotuns into Asgard and yes, he played a role in the Battle of New York, but both situations were not his fault completely. I was the one who initiated the problem with the Jotuns in the first place, was I not? Why am I not to be punished as well?"

"My son, your words are honorable, but it would be foolish of me to take you from your duties protecting the realms. It would do more harm than good."

There was a loud growl from Thor, a sound Loki hadn't heard since before things had gone bad between them. The crown prince of Asgard rarely let his temper get the better of him these days.

"Loki was raised to protect the realms as well. Give him a chance. We could stand together in battle and do more than I could alone. Why do you not see reason?"

"Because he thinks he's the smartest man in the universe and he won't be told off by anyone beneath him. Really Thor, I thought you knew this." Loki muttered from outside, turning the page of his book.

"We will continue this conversation later or else we'll be late for the feast." Footsteps sounded in the direction of the door, but halted at the sound of Thor's voice.

"I don't believe I am coming to dinner. In fact, I think I will say my farewells to Mother and get back _home_. Do not expect to hear from me any time soon."

Loki's eyes widened and he snapped the book shut. He jumped to his feet and stared when his brother exited the study with a rigid scowl on his face. Lengthening his stride to keep up with the obviously furious prince, Loki tried to comprehend what had just happened.

"Thor," He hissed, "What are you doing?"

"He asked me, after the invasion by Ultron, if I wanted to take up my rightful place as king. I refused him, thinking none could do his job better than he. Now I dearly wish that I had accepted."

"Do not create a rift between yourself and Odin on my account," Loki tried to lighten the mood a little, "Besides, he'll be dead soon enough and then you can do whatever you like."

Thor shot a glare at his brother and Loki realized joking about the death of one's father was not something reformed criminals were supposed to do. He winced but kept walking.

"So, what is your plan then? Leave Asgard and don't come back until he starts doing what you want him to? That might be a while."

 _And_ , he thought to himself, _Then I would be all alone here._

"What else can I do?" Thor stopped and put a hand on his brother's shoulder, "I miss you, brother. Why can't Father see reason unless it suits him to?"

"As much as I hate to admit it, he does have generally good motives," Loki said quietly, "Perhaps he has some plan in mind and it simply has not come to fruition."

"I do not see the good in letting you waste away in the palace. I know you could do so much more if you were not confined here. Whether Father believes it or not, you have changed."

Loki spotted a look in Thor's eyes that only ever meant trouble. The blond prince had had the same look right before attacking Jotunheim. And then there was the time, back when Thor and Jane had been still dating, when some idiot named Dr. Doom had been foolish enough to capture Jane. Thor had come to ask Loki for strategy plans and had the same gleam in his eye then as well. To be sure, Doom was sufficiently punished, but Thor also broke many Midgardian laws in the process and was suspended from the Avengers for two months.

"Whatever you are thinking about, stop it," Loki warned, "Odin will be furious if you go against his word so don't try anything foolish."

"Perhaps making him furious is exactly what I want to do right now."

"Do you want him to take me off probation and toss me back in my cell? Because you know he'll blame me for whatever scheme you are thinking of attempting. And you're not listening."

Thor's pace quickened and Loki had to rush to keep up with him.

"I've come up with the perfect plan."

"I have only the highest doubts about that. Slow down and talk about this! If you are going to do something stupid then at least tell me so I can help you avoid getting caught."

"No, no. This plan only works if you have no idea what it entails." Thor had a wicked grin on his face now and Loki was getting ready to rush back to Odin and tell him to do something about it.

"You can't-"

"I will see you soon, but first I must collect something."

" _Thor!_ " Loki shouted as his brother sprinted off, "Blast."

* * *

Heimdall was minding the business of everyone in the world peacefully when he heard footsteps behind him. He turned to see Thor with a large smirk on his face and an even larger bag slung over his shoulder. The bag was thrashing about wildly. The Gatekeeper raised an eyebrow.

"My prince," He clamped a fist to his chest, "Returning to Midgard so soon?"

"Yes, Father and I had a bit of a falling out. Besides, we are closing on the house soon and that will be a very busy time for Jane and I." Thor set the bag down and kicked it. Whatever was in it started wriggling about even more and then began to glow a green hue.

Heimdall sighed.

"My prince?"

"Hmm?"

"What is in the bag?"

"Uh…"

 **Thirty-two Minutes Earlier**

"Brother? Could I ask you a question?" Thor stepped into Loki's chambers carrying what appeared to be a blanket in his hands.

"Does this question have anything to do with whatever ill conceived plan you came up with?" Loki looked away from the card tower he was building.

"Noooo…" Thor smiled innocently, "Not at all. I was just mixing a potion and I wondered if I did it correctly."

"You? Mixing a potion?" Loki scoffed, "Best let me have a look unless you wish to kill us all."

"Here, it's supposed to be a silencing potion, but something is missing." Thor held out a beaker to his brother. Loki took it and swirled it lightly.

"The color is off. Did you use _fresh_ clover leaves or the dried ones from the cupboard?"

"Fresh."

"And the stardust?"

"From Mother's secret stash."

"Then I see no reason it should be this color," Loki furrowed his brow at it, "And frankly I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be touching it considering my probation."

"Come now, you are just giving me advice. You aren't actually making the potion," Thor took the beaker back and eyed it, "Wasn't there a personal ingredient I needed too? Like an eyelash from the person drinking it?"

"Don't be ridiculous, eyelashes are never used in potions," Loki rolled his eyes, "You need saliva."

"Oh!" Thor nodded, "Of course. I shall have to go collect some."

"Who is it for?" Loki asked curiously.

"Err," Thor froze, "Fandral. He has been driving the ladies of the court mad and I thought this might shut him up for a bit. I'll slip it in his mead."

"Ha," Loki went back to his card tower, "I'm surprised I never thought of doing that."

"Before I go, would you like one of these Midgardian candies I brought with me? I know you like Jelly Beans immensely."

"Thank you," Loki smiled and took the bag of candies from his brother, "The peach are especially good."

"Hmm, yes." Thor was watching him eagerly so Loki grabbed a peach one and popped it in his mouth. The moment he bit down, though, he knew something was wrong.

"Gaaah! Norns!" He gagged on the bean as his mouth was filled with the taste, not of peach, but something akin to vomit. Desperate to get the taste out of his mouth he spit the candy out into his hand. Before he could find a way to dispose of the bean Thor snatched it away and put it in the beaker filled with silencing potion.

"So sorry, brother, must have given you the wrong bag of candy. Those are called Bean Boozled… it's a game involving purposefully bad tasting sweets. Horrible, isn't it?"

Loki was still gagging. He knocked over his card tower to grab a glass of water that was behind it and swished some water around in his mouth.

"Water alone will never rid you of the taste…" Thor grinned and held out his beaker, "Try this!"

Loki wasn't thinking. His tongue had been violated and he would try anything to get rid of the vile lingerings of the candy. He chugged whatever his brother put in his hand right as he realized _what_ his brother had put in his hand. He stood up abruptly and intended to yell at Thor, but no sound came out.

"Oh no! I must have handed the silencing potion to you by mistake. How foolish of me," Thor ignored Loki's silent murderous glares and began to unfold the cloth he had with him, "So oafish, I'm sure you'd agree. Terribly sorry. 'My bad' as the humans say."

Attempting to yell profanities while Thor calmly opened up the fabric into a bag, Loki began to put two and two together. He quickly dodged out of the way right as Thor lunged forward with the bag. Unfortunately, he wasn't quite quick enough to avoid the second swipe and he soon found himself in a very uncomfortable position within a stuffy bag.

 **Present:**

"Your Highness, what is in the bag?"

"A baby Bilgesnipe. I promised Banner I would bring one back for him to study."

"You are not a very good liar, my prince." Heimdall said.

"I'm not lying. I'd best get back now. Could you open the Bifrost?"

"Could you leave the bag behind?"

"I'd prefer not to."

Thor picked up the bag again, prepared to fight his friend and make a run for it, though he wasn't sure that he could effectively operate the machinery. But, he didn't have to do anything drastic, as it turned out. Heimdall merely shrugged, turned, and opened the portal back to Midgard.

Nodding his thanks, Thor hoisted the bag containing the "bilgesnipe" over his shoulder and stepped toward the portal.

"Just so you know, it is my duty to tell the King of what I have seen," Heimdall said gravely, "I am sure he will be irritated that you have taken such a wild creature with you to Midgard. Bilgesnipe can be incredibly unpredictable."

"I will keep that in mind, thank you."

And with that, the crown prince and his thrashing bag stepped into the portal and traveled back to the middle realm.

 **A/N: Yeah, so four years have passed since the dance studio incident. Should be fun to write a five year old Tova. Imagine all the trouble she'll get into now that she can talk in complete sentences!**

 **Thanks for reading! :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Just a short one for right now. More of a plot-mover-alonger than anything else. Hopefully still interesting and enjoyable. :) Thanks for reading!**

When Loki finally escaped the bag he came face to face with the majority of the Avengers. He suddenly had flashbacks of when the Chitauri had failed and these same people had come for him in the very building he was in now. It was an effort not to put his hands up in surrender again.

"Father shall be most displeased," Thor was saying to the others, "Might Loki stay here for the time being? Until I've reasoned with Odin?"

" _Him_? Stay in Avengers Tower? While I have my family here?" Tony crossed his arms, "Not likely. Can't he stay with you?"

"I only thought that since Wanda is here for a short time she might be able to keep him in check should any problems arise."

"Wait, what's Wanda doing here?" Captain Rogers asked.

"Something went wrong with the water in their building so she's staying here while Vision tries to fix it."

"Y'know, if it were Vision here then I'd totally let Loki stay. I mean, Vis can just summon Mjolnir if he has to, right?" Tony was glaring down at Loki, "But I don't know if Wanda can handle him."

"Handle whom?" A heavily accented voice asked as Wanda stepped into the room with a duffle bag over her shoulder. When she spotted Loki sitting on the floor she raised an eyebrow, "Oh, I see."

"No offense, Tinker Bell, but-"

"You don't think I could take him in a fight?" She set the bag down on a nearby table, "He does not even have his seidr. He poses no threat."

If the silencing spell had not still been in effect Loki would have sided with the Scarlet Witch. He also might have argued that he had no plans to do anything until Thor got things sorted with Odin and even then all he wanted was to live peacefully alongside them - at least for the time being.

The heroes all shifted uncomfortably, most of them turning to Tony to see his reaction. He was pouting and crossing his arms. Loki wasn't sure he'd be allowed to stay.

"It is up to you Tony, but I am well prepared to handle him. And if I am not and he attempts something we call in Bruce."

Loki swallowed nervously at that. He certainly didn't want them to resort to bringing in the Hulk. He would rather be back in Asgard than deal with the angry green beast.

"Ah, you see?" Wanda chuckled, "He has gone pale at the mention of the doctor. He will not try anything. Not that I think he would anyways," She paused and regarded him curiously, "I know that he would not."

"And you remember, Stark," Thor clapped a hand on his friend's shoulder, "Cole and Loki have gotten along quite well in the past. If I trust him around my child do you not trust him around yours?"

"Yeah, well my kid isn't an indestructible, super strong, alien princess!"

"Tony," Wanda said gently, "He will do no harm. I can sense it."

"Ugh! Fine. He can stay for a week! One week."

Loki tried to smile politely at Stark, but it must have come off as too smug because the Man of Iron glared at him. Loki got up off of the floor where Thor had dumped him and offered his hand to shake.

"Why is he being so eerily quiet?" Stark asked, narrowing his eyes, "I don't like it."

"I, um, gave him a silencing potion. It should wear off soon… I think?"

Loki rolled his eyes. The size of the dose that Thor gave him would take about a day to wear off. Thor truly knew nothing of potions or any of the magical arts.

"You drugged your own brother?"

"And kidnapped him. He certainly did not ride in the bag willingly," Thor laughed, "I told Heimdall he was an infant Bilgesnipe."

"Wait, wait," Tony put up his hand, "So he's here against his will?!"

"I assure you, he wanted to come back to Midgard, but he didn't want to anger our father. Father would have kept him in Asgard for the rest of his days and Loki would have gone along with it, hoping that his good behavior would grant him freedom eventually."

"So you," Tony rubbed his forehead, "You broke Asgardian law? Why?"

"Loki did not deserve to be trapped in the palace for the rest of his life. He would do better fighting alongside the Avengers," Thor stated as if it was the simplest thing in the world.

In truth, Loki didn't have any fondness for the Avengers, but he wouldn't mind fighting alongside his brother once more, like in the old days. Before things became complicated. And if being allied with the Avengers was what it took to be around Thor, Jane, and Tova then he would be the first to offer the hand of friendship.

"So out of the two of you, he's actually the one who has been following the law lately," Tony rolled his eyes and finally shook Loki's hand, "You can have one of the guest rooms - three floors beneath my family and on the opposite end of the building."

Loki nodded.

"Thor?" Captain Rogers asked.

"Yes?"

"Are you sure Odin isn't going to bring Asgardian forces down on us for harboring a fugitive?"

"He would not be so foolish. In his heart he knows that Loki will do no harm. I've simply wounded his ego and I must make him see reason. I shall return soon - don't let him out of the building."

With that last warning, Thor left the building, presumably to open the Bifrost outside where it wouldn't make a hole in the ceiling. Loki watched him go and then turned back to the three Avengers that were watching him. Rogers and Stark were scowling, but Wanda only smiled pleasantly at him.

"Dinner is at six," Tony snapped, "I hope you like spaghetti."

The billionaire shoved past him on his way out of the room, even though there was plenty of room to go around him. Loki, had he not been on his very best behavior for the past four years, would have shoved him back. Possibly out a window. But all he did was let Stark pass by and roll his eyes after the other man had gone. Unfortunately, Captain Rogers caught his brief moment of sass and glared at him. Loki sighed. This was going to be a very long week.


	15. Chapter 15

It did not take long for Odin to see reason… especially since Frigga was already furious with him for treating Loki so poorly. She even admitted to helping Thor perfect his plan when he'd come to her asking for help. As much as this irritated the Allfather, he could do nothing to persuade his wife and son to return Loki to his house arrest in the palace.

So, much to everyone bar Odin's delight, Loki moved out of Avengers Tower and into the house that Thor and Jane had recently purchased. It turned out that they had bought the house with Loki living there in mind and there was a small apartment above the garage that they told him he could live in. The home was far enough outside of the city that they had a yard and picket fence, but not so far that going to work at the Tower was inconvenient for Thor. And they were close to a fantastic, rather new, lab that had been set up with the sole purpose of studying interdimensional travel so Jane was pleased.

When Thor, Jane, and Loki pulled into the driveway of the house Loki couldn't help but grin when he saw Tova running around the front yard laughing, with Darcy chasing her. When the five year old saw her parents she sprinted over to them with much more agility than a normal child might have. Jane swept her up into a hug and blew a raspberry on her chubby cheek.

"Mommy!" Tova squealed happily. She squirmed and jumped into Thor's arms and he gave her a raspberry kiss on her other cheek, "Thor!"

"She calls you Thor?" Loki smirked.

"It is a phase she is currently progressing through, awkward as it may be," Thor replied, "Her friends on her soccer team call me Mr. Thor and she picked it up."

"What is soccer?"

"Some silly Midgardian sport," Thor waved the question away.

"She is so young and yet you have put her in dance lessons and this soccer? Do you not think that it is a bit much a five year old?"

"If she ever seems like she isn't enjoying it we'll take her out," Jane commented, "But the truth is that she has so much energy that she needs some kind of constructive outlet. She still likes dance and she's made lots of friends in soccer."

"Mommy, are we going to soccer today?" Tova asked cheerfully. Loki was impressed by the amount of vocabulary and clarity of speech that she'd gained.

"Not today, Tova, tomorrow," Jane replied, "Today you get to play with Uncle Loki, do you remember him?"

Tova turned to Loki as if noticing him for the first time. He could have sworn he saw an eyebrow raise skeptically, as if she was doubting that playing with a stranger could be anywhere near as fun as playing soccer. Then her eyes lit up and Loki wondered if she actually did remember him and all the fun they'd had together and the games they'd played and the whale book and finger painting and-

"Who's this?" She giggled, "Who's he?"

Loki swept into an elegant bow with much more exaggerated movement than one expected from a bow, particularly to a child.

"I am Loki, of Asgard!" He declared with a wink and then grudgingly added for clarification: "Brother of Thor."

Thor put Tova down. Rather than hide bashfully behind her parents as many children did around newcomers, she walked purposefully up to him with her tiny strides and stuck out her chubby fingers. Loki shook her hand and tried not to laugh at the serious expression on her face.

"I am Tova Thordottir-Foster of Midgard and it is a pleasure to meet your surveillance."

"No, Tova babe, it's 'make your acquaintance'," Darcy giggled from nearby, "I taught her how to do that. Her soccer team got a kick out of it and now they all introduce themselves like that."

"I am also pleased to meet your surveillance," Loki smirked, "And make your acquaintance."

"Do you know how to play tag?" Tova inquired with all seriousness.

"I do not," Loki admitted.

"I'll teach you!" She yanked his hand with alarming strength and pulled him into the yard.

"Not right now, Tova, it's time for dinner," Thor called, "You may play tag after you eat some of the fine tacos that Darcy has made for us to feast upon."

"Thor…" Tova groaned, "I don't wanna feast upon! Wanna play tag with this guy!"

"He'll still be here when you're done with dinner," Jane said, "C'mon!"

"You'd rather play with this weirdo than eat my homemade, super delicious, mega wonderful, definitely one hundred percent not from a recipe on the back of the taco seasoning tacos?"

"Yes!" Tova giggled, "Tacos are gross!"

"W-what?!" Darcy clasped a hand to her heart, "Take that back this instant or I refuse to ever play with you again! Tacos are the best thing in this world!"

"Tacos are gross."

"I am so glad you think so," Loki replied smoothly, "Because that means I get to eat yours and I am ever so hungry. Have fun playing tag while I eat all the tacos."

Tova gasped and sprinted into the house. By the time Loki had followed the family inside Tova was sitting in one of the kitchen chairs in the most uncomfortable looking position possible. Jane gently patted her daughter's knees and Tova sat in a semi-normal position instead and turned to grin at Loki.

"Sit with me!"

"I don't know," Loki said, "I think I might sit with Darcy."

"No! Sit with me!"

"If you insist," He sat down next to her.

Darcy brought the food to the table and made up a little taco for Tova. Loki watched her technique because he'd never eaten a taco before so when he put his own together he followed her movements. Then he watched how Tova ate hers and decided that he'd follow suit. He found it a bit odd that she at from the closed part of the shell out to the open because much of the meat and vegetables fell out that way, but he supposed…

"Brother," Thor laughed, "Do not copy Tova's eating habits, they only lead to mess."

"Then how am I supposed to eat this?" Loki snapped. Jane quietly demonstrated and Loki mimicked her.

When everyone was finished with the meal Tova grabbed Loki's arm and once again pulled him to the yard. They played tag for about an hour before it got dark and Jane called them in for bed. Tova didn't seem too pleased to be removed from the repetitive and rather boring game of tag (which had turned into freeze tag at one point, which didn't work well with the two of them and quickly changed to hide and seek tag and then back to normal tag). When it seemed like the little girl was going to protest going in the house, Loki swooped her up onto his shoulders and she shrieked with laughter. Then he galloped into the house, but forgot he was a whole five year old taller and did not duck under the door frame.

There was a loud _thwack!_ Followed by a _crunch!_ And then a chunk of the door frame came off in the shape of Tova's head. The little girl was still smiling and did not appear to be bothered by the fact that her face had just gone through wood and drywall. Loki winced, but simply closed the door and hoped Jane and Thor wouldn't notice. However, after all he'd done, with them still not hating him, he doubted and hoped that they wouldn't turn him out because of slipup. They seemed far too set on making him a member of their household. And he didn't mind that a bit.

 **A/N: Hehehe... I didn't mean to write that last part, it just kind of slipped out. Sorry, not sorry. When I can't think of anything witty to write I resort to cartoon level physical humor. I hope you enjoyed it regardless!**

 **Thanks for reading! Feel free to tell me what you thought in a review, I'd appreciate it lots and lots! :)**


	16. Chapter 16

For the first time in about four years, Loki's sleep was not plagued by nightmares. He slept so well that he didn't even wake up until he heard a faint but persistent knocking on the door of his little apartment. He rubbed his eyes, glanced at the clock, and got out of bed. Upon opening the door he looked down to see Tova.

She was dressed in a T-shirt that boasted a turquoise, sparkly Avengers logo and matching turquoise shorts. Her hair was done up in two bouncy ponytails and her feet were covered in tiny little running shoes.

"Good morning," Loki said with a smile.

"Thor says to come down for breakfast," she smiled back, "Your hair looks funny!"

"So does yours," He replied, stepping out into the hallway, "What's for breakfast?"

"Poptarts!"

"With Thor cooking I should have known," Loki rolled his eyes and made for the stairs, but was slowed when Tova grabbed onto his leg and took a seat on his bare foot, "What are you doing little princess?"

"Keep walking!" She giggled, "I want a ride!"

Loki shrugged and did as she asked. She shrieked with laughter the whole way down the stairs and into the kitchen. When they arrived at the table he lifted his foot and shook her off into her chair. Thor came in with a plate of Poptarts and a bowl of fruit salad.

"Good morning, brother!" He boomed, setting the food down, "I see Tova has manipulated you into giving her a free ride!"

"I was not manipulated," Loki scoffed, grabbing a poptart.

"She took advantage of the fact that you are new here and do not know the rules," Thor went to the stove and grabbed a pot of oatmeal, "We recently decided that Tova is too big for riding on people's feet, didn't we Tova?"

"Yeah…" Tova replied sadly.

"Why? She is rather light, is she not?"

"For you and I, perhaps, but at five whole years old she is getting too big for Mommy and Darcy to carry her around like that."

"Fine." Loki and Tova both sighed.

"Now eat up! I have provided a balanced breakfast for today because it is to be a very exciting day!" Thor sat down and began to munch on a bit of everything so Tova and Loki followed suit.

"Why is today to be exciting?" Loki asked.

"Soccer practice!" Tova screamed.

"Inside voice," Thor reminded gently, "But yes! Today is the last practice before their first match on Saturday!"

"That is exciting, might I tag along?"

"Of course!" Thor smiled and then whispered, "Father and Mother do not want me leaving you alone anyway."

* * *

To get to soccer practice they needed to drive the minivan. Considering Loki knew that Thor was not the most safe pilot in the realms, he was more than a little terrified to ride along in a foreign vehicle with him. He was also shocked that Jane allowed Tova to ride with her father, given she had also seen him fly a ship.

"I just passed the driver's test last month!" Thor announced proudly, after they'd wrangled Tova into her car seat, "So this should be a simple task!"

"Have you ever driven without Jane before?" Loki asked.

"No, but I'm sure it is just the same with or without her," He climbed into the driver's seat and strapped on his seatbelt, "Now. Which lever makes it go in reverse?"

Loki's eyes widened and he quickly fastened his own seatbelt.

A few minutes later they rolled through yet another intersection, though Loki was fairly certain that a giant red sign that said "STOP" actually meant you were supposed to stop. Thor waved off his protest declaring that there was no one else at the intersection so there was no need to bother with more than slowing down.

Things did not improve when they got to the parking lot of the soccer field.

"Thor… Thor! Thor! You're going to hit that child!"

"He's fine, see? His mother moved him out of the way - ooh! Here is a parking spot!"

"Thor!" Loki shrieked, squirming in his seat and clinging to the dash for dear life as they swung at breakneck speed into the spot, "You are going to hit the other vehicles!"

"We'll make it!" Thor persevered and they got into the parking space - only taking off the mirror of the car to their right. Thor shrugged when he saw the damage, grabbed some duct tape from the glove box and put the mirror back on.

They had some difficulties getting Tova out of her seat and Thor suggested they cut the straps, but Loki reminded him that they still needed the carseat to function for their return trip. It took them ten minutes, but eventually they figured it out and got her out of her carseat and into the field. She quickly ran over to the other little children, who were absently bouncing white and black balls around.

"Tova, so glad you could finally join us," A tall man with a cap, aviator sunglasses, and whistle snapped when the little girl ran onto the field. Loki instantly disliked the man.

"Apologies for our late arrival!" Thor said to the coach, "Jane had to work today."

"Stop making excuses and go sit with the other moms," The coach snapped.

Thor looked ready to make some sort of comment, but he merely patted Tova on the head, told her that her water bottle would be with him if she needed it and went to sit with the other parents. Loki followed.

"Hey Thor," One of the mother's nodded. The rest of the parents ignored them completely, "Coach Yaeger is really in a mood today."

"Hello Tina," Thor nodded sitting on the shiny bleachers next to the woman, "What has caused Coach Yaeger's fowl mood today?"

"No idea," Tina went back to reading the book she'd been engaged in before they came in and Loki took a moment to assess the other parents. Fathers and mothers half filled the bleachers and all of them seemed more interested in their phones than the sport their children were playing. Bored with the uncaring parents, Loki decided to watch what the youngsters were up to.

After an hour of watching the children chase the ball around and try and kick it in the goal, Loki was glad to hear the peeved Coach Yaeger put an end to the soccer practice. He then summoned all of the parents to him and reminded them that they needed to bring their kids, in their uniforms, to this field on Saturday at precisely eleven o'clock. He also ordered someone to bring snacks, but it seemed that all of the parents wanted to shirk that duty and finally Thor volunteered.

"Fine, but you'd better bring something healthy," Yaeger barked, "Don't any of you be late or your kid will be benched for the game. Got it?"

"Yes Coach Yaeger!" The parents chimed.

As that was the end of practice, Thor and Loki went to get Tova from where she was playing with her friends. All of the kids looked up excitedly.

"Mr. Thor!" They exclaimed.

"Hello," Thor nodded, "Tova it is time to go home."

"Five more minutes!" Tova pleaded.

"No Tova, we must go."

"Aw, Thor!" She whined, sitting down in the grass, "I don't wanna go!"

"Come along Tova, we must get home for lunch."

"No."

"Daughter, do not make me count to three."

"Please!"

"One."

"Thor! Pretty please!"

"Two…"

Loki raised an eyebrow.

"You never let me do fun things!" Tova whined, grabbing her water bottle from him and stomping toward the car. Her friends called out saddened goodbyes.

"What would have happened when you reached three?" Loki asked quietly, as they walked back to the car.

"Truthfully? I do not know. Jane never makes it to three when I'm around. I have only recently picked up the technique. I am bluffing," Thor chuckled, "But Jane's punishment at three must be fearsome for Tova always caves at two."

"Interesting."

They piled back into the car, took fifteen minutes to figure out how to get Tova buckled in, and then set off at a speed that had to be illegal. They arrived home without major incident and enjoyed a nice lunch of mac, cheese, and broccoli. All of which Thor burnt.

* * *

It was the big day and Thor's household was abuzz with activity. All through the house there were shouts inquiring if Tova's uniform was in the dryer and if the snacks were ready. The answer to both of those questions turned out to be negative and the hubbub heightened. Darcy arrived, adding to the chaos and Loki rolled out of bed later than he'd meant to, so he wasn't much help to begin with.

"What is going on?" He asked groggily.

"The soccer game!" Thor managed as he furiously cooked breakfast, "Do you know how to make snacks? Perhaps the package of Betty Crocker brownies from the cupboard?"

"That vile coach said they needed to be healthy snacks," Loki pointed out, "But worry not. I shall manage something."

"I'll take care of Tovie's uniform!" Darcy announced, running to the laundry room.

"Thor!" Jane called as she came down the stairs with Tova following, "Thor you're Avenger phone is ringing!"

"My what?"

"The phone thing, you know! The one that Tony always calls on?"

"What of it?"

"It's ringing and the caller ID says it's Steve!"

"Steve?" Thor briefly abandoned the scrambled eggs and grabbed the phone from his wife, answering it, "Captain Rogers? Hello?"

"Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mommy. Maaaaah-mmeeeee!" Tova exclaimed passionately.

"Honey, not right now, I've got to find your uniform."

"I've got her uniform!" Darcy came out of the laundry room with a damp, sky-blue jersey in one hand and a hair dryer in the other.

"What are you doing?"

"This works faster than the dryer."

"Mommy!"

"Not right now, Tova."

"What do you mean a troll is destroying Queens?" Thor asked his phone.

"Jane, do we have any spinach?" Loki asked.

"Darcy, just put it in the dryer!" Jane snapped, "Tony suped it up so it has a turbo mode!"

"Jane, the spinach?"

"Mommy!"

"No, I do not know how a troll found its way to Queens, isn't Queens Spider-boy's territory anyway?"

"No Loki, we don't have any spinach!"

"Then how am I supposed to make a healthy snack?"

"Ah yes, sorry _Spiderman_. Isn't Queen's his area?"

"Jane! The dryer made a weird beeping noise at me!"

"Perhaps we have some bananas," Loki went to the fruit bowl on the table, "Oh blast, we are all out of bananas too?"

"Mommy!"

"Jane!"

"Jane are there bananas hiding somewhere in this house?"

"The troll is eating a schoolbus?"

"Mommy!"

"The dryer!"

"Bananas?"

"Can everyone be quiet for a minute!" Jane exclaimed and silence descended on the kitchen, "Thank you! Darcy the dryer is supposed to beep. Just take care of it. Thor, go fight the troll and maybe you can make it by halftime, okay? Loki, just do what you can with what we have, and no, we don't have bananas. Use something from the fridge," She finally turned to Tova, "What do you need, sweetie?"

"I forgot."

"Okay then. I need to answer my phone, so everyone calm down for just a second," She picked up her cell and smiled cheerfully into it, "Hello, Dr. Foster speaking."

Thor gave her a quick peck on the cheek, hugged Tova, warned Loki and Darcy to behave, and flew off. Darcy got the jersey dried and Loki settled on making brownies with leftover peas and carrots mixed in. They were all silent until Jane finished her phone call.

"Okay, that was work," She told them, "They just found readings about a portal opening up nearby and they want me to come check it out. Darcy, Loki, can you take Tova to her game? I'll try to get there as soon as I can."

"No problem Jane!" Darcy chirped, "We can totally handle it."

"As soon as these brownies are done we will be out the door and be the first to arrive at the game. And we shall rub it in Coach Yaeger's face."

"Great, thank you so much! I'll be there as soon as I can!" Jane paused, "Oh, one of you has to wear this too."

She tossed them a T-shirt.

"Yaeger's new rule so that he can make sure there is at least one parent there for every kid. Plus, Cindy's mom made it so she'll throw a hissy fit if _someone_ doesn't wear it."

"Is that the same Cindy's mom who I accidentally turned into a ox?" Loki asked nervously.

"Yes. Yaeger is her boyfriend so she never comes to practices, but Cindy is on the team. I'm sorry, I forgot you two have history."

"It will be fine. I highly doubt I can accidentally transform someone into an ox twice."

Jane looked skeptical, but left.

Darcy was frowning at the T-shirt she'd been tossed and quickly shoved it at Loki.

"I call not wearing it."

Loki rolled his eyes and glanced at the shirt. He sighed and put it on over his green tunic. He supposed it wasn't so bad, and it might even be decent if it wasn't so bedazzled.

Before he realized what was happening, Darcy had snapped a picture of him in the shirt.

"I'm _so_ texting this to Tony."

Loki groaned, but simply continued to make his brownies. He couldn't help glancing down at his shirt several times though. The blinged out letters proudly declared him a "Soccer Mom", and he wasn't even completely sure what that meant. Oh well, the most important thing now was getting Tova to her soccer game.

 **A/N: Thanks for reading! :) I'll post the soccer game chapter as soon as I'm done editing it!**


	17. Chapter 17

As much as Loki disliked Darcy, he had to admit that she was a much better driver than Thor. Even if she drove far too fast. They arrived, not as early as they'd have liked, but at about the same time the rest of the soccer players were arriving.

Wanting to disguise himself upon seeing Cheri, aka Cindy's mom, climbing out of a huge black, expensive looking SUV, Loki grabbed a pair of sunglasses that were in the glove compartment and put them on. Darcy shrugged and did the same and then handed Tova some sparkly, pink polka dotted, heart shaped sunglasses as well.

"Alright kiddos," She said, getting out of the car and unbuckling Tova with ease, "Let's blow this popsicle stand."

"Blow this popsicle stand," Tova agreed with a giggle, "C'mon Loki."

"I am coming!" He was actually struggling to get the cooler full of juice boxes and the pan of brownies out of the trunk along with some outdoor folding chairs (since Jane warned them the tiny bleachers would probably be full). Once he'd managed it, they made their way to the field, walking confidently toward the it and feeling cool in their shades.

Once the chairs and cooler were all set up, Darcy covered Tova's exposed skin with sunscreen and sent her out to stretch with the other kids. She turned back to Loki and offered her hand for a fist bump. He hesitantly complied.

"Woo! We are the best babysitters ever. We are here with fifteen minutes to spare! Take that Coach Yaeger!"

"I would not celebrate just yet," Loki warned, "It appears that Yaeger is still glaring at us. Did he just crouch down and snap at Tova?"

"Say what?" Darcy spun to look at the coach and scowled, "He's got his hand on her shoulder and everything!"

"Odin's beard!" Loki hissed, "I see tears!"

"Tears?"

"Tova is crying! Her face is beet red and she is crying!"

"What?! Why? What did that scumbag say to her?"

"I do not know," Loki clenched his fists.

"He better at least have the decency to come tell us what he's pissed about," Darcy stomped her foot, "Whatever he can say to her he can say to us."

"Apparently not because he is leaving her to her tears and walking away to flirt with Cheri!" Loki growled.

"Ugh! I should go over there and talk to him!"

"Allow me," Loki rolled up the sleeves of his tunic under his T-shirt and marched over to the coach, "Is there some complaint you would like to lodge with us? Why is my niece crying?"

"Huh?" Yaeger turned away from Cheri for a moment, "What do you want?"

"Why is Tova crying?"

"I don't know, because she's a weakling?"

"What did you say to her?!"

"I told her she couldn't play today."

"What?! Why not?!"

Yaeger narrowed his eyes at Loki.

"Because she has zero parents present. All I see are a hasbeen supervillain and a ditzy sidekick. The rules of the team clearly state that she has to have a parent or guardian present. Plus you're late."

"We are not late!" Loki crossed his arms, "We are, in fact, early!"

"Well, then how come I was here before you, huh?" Cheri snapped, "I'm surprised you're on this planet at all after the horrors you caused last time you were here."

"You and your massive vehicle pulled in at the same time we did," Loki sneered, "We aren't late. And as for having a parental figure: you said parent or guardian. I am Tova's Guardian. I am the stand in for her parents when they cannot be here. I am wearing this hideous shirt and I brought snacks for all of the children - including Cheri's brat."

"Hey! You take that back this instant!" Cheri shrilled.

"Make me," Loki sneered, "Now Coach, are you going to play my niece or not? She deserves to play. I did not see _Cindy_ at practice on Thursday."

"Cindy had piano practice!"

"Learn to prioritize, Cheri," Loki tossed his hair over his shoulder, "Yaeger, you'd better play Tova."

"You think you intimidate me?"

"Play Tova or I'll actually _try_ to intimidate you."

Yaeger looked like he wanted to punch Loki, but with the children watching he merely shrugged.

"Fine. I'll play the weakling. But as soon as she starts messing up she's on the bench."

Loki snorted and muttered something rude under his breath before spinning on his heel and approaching the still crying Tova. He crouched down next to her and wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed.

"Don't worry, princess, you'll get to play. That idiot Yaeger caved like the milksop he is."

"I can play?"

"Yes. Have fun, do your best, and don't be afraid to shove Cindy out of the way."

"Okay!" Her tears seemed to dry up instantly and she rushed off to warm up with her friends. Loki went back to sit next to Darcy, who offered him another fist bump. He didn't hesitate this time.

"Nicely done," She said, handing him a juice box, "I could see the rabies foam on Cheri's mouth from here, what did you say to her?"

"I pointed out that Cindy wasn't at practice on Thursday so if anyone should be benched it should be that brat."

"And she really is a brat," Darcy groaned, "She is a year or so older than Tova and she's always doing those mean kid tricks to her. You know, the really stupid ones like pointing out a stain on your shirt?"

"I've never heard of that."

"You're the god of tricks and lies and you've never heard of the shirt stain prank?"

"No. How does it go?"

"Well you- oh, hang on, you spilled some juice right there," Darcy poked his chest and when he bent his head to look she lifted her finger and poked his nose, "It goes like that."

"Haha. So amusing."

"It actually kind of was," Darcy snickered, "Oooh! The game's starting!"

* * *

As the soccer game progressed, it seemed to get more and more boring for the players, but more intense for the parents and spectators. While the kids trudged and dragged their feet their parents screamed "encouragements" and repeatedly shouted the word "go" and then the child's name. Loki would have been embarrassed to admit that he and Darcy picked up on this trend as well.

"Go, go, go Tova!" He shouted, wildly clapping as she followed the herd of children that were chasing the ball. There was no tactic or strategy to it, they all followed the ball like moths to a flame, but there was something invigorating about watching Tova run faster than the other kids.

"Oh! Oh! She's got the ball! C'mon Tovie! Make a goal! Make a goal!" Darcy bellowed, "You can do it!"

The excitable brunette was alternating between filming the event and shouting praises to Tova. Then, right as the girl was about to make a goal a kid from the other team stole the ball and pushed Tova over as he did so.

"What?!" Loki and Darcy yelled together.

"Oh come on! That's not a fowl?!" Darcy pouted, "That has got to be a fowl!"

"Indeed! Open your eyes you blind referee!" Loki agreed and the ref glared at him.

"Time out!" Coach Yaeger shouted when the other team scored and the kids all huddled around him. When the break ended the kids returned to the field, but Tova had been held back and was now sitting morosely on the bench.

"That dweeb benched Tova!" Darcy hissed.

"What in the nine realms was he thinking?! She is by far the best player out there! He cannot bench her!"

"Sit down, would ya pal?" Some old man behind him said, "I can't see the field."

"I will not sit down," Loki sneered, "You should move your chair somewhere that is not directly behind me."

"Yeah!" Darcy said.

"It's shady _here_ ," The old man replied, standing up and stepping closer, "So sit your butt down before I make you, Soccer Mom."

"You vile insignificant-"

"Hello Loki!" Thor boomed, coming over and grabbing the spare folding chair, "Care to introduce me to your new friend?"

Loki mumbled something about the old fool and then sat down in his chair. He angrily took a sip from his juice box and Darcy joined him.

"Hey Thor," Darcy said.

"I trust you two are staying out of trouble?"

"You could say that. How was the troll?"

"It wasn't a troll, it was simply the Rhino, but he'd gotten covered in hair somehow," Thor laughed, "So what is the score?"

"One to zero, them," Loki said bitterly, "We'd be tied if the idiot ref did his job."

"I am sure he is doing his best."

"It doesn't help that Yaeger is being a total moron and benching Tova."

"I'm sure she is tired and needs the break anyway."

"Have you heard from Jane?" Darcy asked.

"She is on her way."

"Might as well tell her not to come if Tova is simply going to be sitting on the bench the whole time," Loki grumbled.

The game continued and Jane eventually showed up. When she arrived Yaeger finally put Tova back in and the little girl seemed to have held a grudge against the kid who shoved her because right away she stole the ball from him and kicked it so hard that it flew from the end of the field she was at and went right into the goal at the other side of the field.

"Gooooooooal!" Darcy screamed and Loki applauded as if it was the most impressive thing he'd ever seen. Which, in that moment, he felt it was.

There was groaning from the opposing team's parents and the mother of the child who had shoved Tova shouted something at the ref about how unfair it was. Loki perked up curiously, wondering how in the world she could think it unfair.

"That kid is an alien, isn't she? She shouldn't even be allowed to play!"

"Ma'am, calm down or I'm going to have to ask you to leave," The ref said.

"That freaking alien girl stole the ball from my Mason! It isn't right! She's a super!"

"Ma'am-"

"Even if she did not possess the blood of an Asgardian," Loki commented, joining in the fight, "She could still run circles around your boy. Plus, he pushed her over earlier!"

"Loki," Thor grabbed his brother's shoulder.

"If anyone shouldn't be allowed to play, it should be your kid!"

"Loki."

"Tova did nothing wrong!"

"Loki!"

"What, Thor?!"

"Drop it. Tova is still playing, is she not? Everything is fine."

"But her son hit Tova!"

"Come sit down."

"Fine." He motioned to the woman that he'd have his eyes on her and she glared at him.

The game continued until time ran out with Tova's team one point ahead. Loki and Darcy cheered so loudly that Thor and Jane had to cover their ears and the old man behind them yelled at them. After the game Loki dragged the cooler and brownie pan over and served treats and juice to every child - even Cindy. Coach Yaeger blabbered on about how they could have done better and then he left.

"Tova, you were marvelous!" Loki told her.

"These brownies are gross."

"Yes, but they are good for you so eat up."

"Loki, I did not realize you enjoyed the sport of soccer so much," Thor laughed, "I thought you were going to jump out of your seat and start coaching the kids in place of Yaeger!"

"I was tempted."

"I think in celebration of their win we should all go out for ice cream!" Jane announced.

"Yay!" The kids dropped their veggie filled brownies and ran to ask their parents for permission to go get ice cream. Loki scowled.

"That's hardly _healthy_ , Jane. Think of all the sugar!"

"Okay, it was funny at first, but please stop soccer-momming everyone. It's getting weird."

"I do not know what you are talking about," Loki smirked, "I am simply passionate about the wellbeing of my niece."

"Why did we bring you back from Asgard again?"

"Oh Jane, come now. You know I am your favorite brother-in-law. You'd be lost without me."

"We wouldn't be enemies with Cheri if it weren't for you," Jane pointed out.

"Are you sure you would want to be her friend?"

"Good point."

They laughed, let Tova play with her friends a bit more and then took all of the kids out for ice cream.

 **A/N: I considered making their team lose... but it's a fluff story, you guys. It is pure fluffy goodness (hopefully) and you won't be finding any exciting plotlines here... at least not in the** ** _near_** **future. Dun, dun duuuuun!**

 **Thanks for reading! And a super-duper thank you to lordvaatithewinndmage, Anna10473, and Juxshoa for your reviews! It was very nice of you!**


	18. Chapter 18

With Thor and the other Avengers watching his every move during the past months, Loki had no opportunities to get into trouble even if he'd wanted to. There were no incidents, though he got dangerously close where his new arch enemies, Cheri and Coach Yaeger, were involved. But soon the summer soccer club came to an end and he was no longer seeing their weasley faces every weekend.

Loki often found the lack of chaos boring, as he prefered a slightly more disorderly climate, but he ignored his boredom because he knew he'd rather be bored on Midgard than locked in a dungeon on Asgard. So he did what he could to lie low and be a help to Thor and Jane around the house. It was irritatingly domestic, but he persevered.

He was irritated that Odin sent one of the Warriors Three to check on him every once in a while, as they always made sure to remind him of his past actions. Always reminding him of the monster he was, but he could even put up with them if it meant he had his pseudo-freedom. Nothing spectacular happened, no one was turned into a baboon, and life at Thor and Jane's house moved on.

One particular day Loki woke, ate breakfast made in his kitchenette, and then went downstairs to see what his brother's family was up to for the day. With summer dwindling to a close Jane was getting Tova ready for her first year of school and there was much to prepare for there. Perhaps she would need his help.

When he wandered into the kitchen he found Tova peacefully coloring at the table and Jane nowhere to be seen, probably in her study. Thor was on a mission last he'd heard so his absence was to be expected. Loki sat down next to his niece and wished her a goodmorning, but she was so engrossed in her coloring that she hardly looked up.

"What are you coloring, Tova?" He asked, furrowing his brow at the creature on the page of her coloring book. The landscape around the beast was supposed to be snowy (though the snow was now every color of the rainbow) and there were pine trees laden with the stuff. The subject of the illustration was a hulking figure with spikes protruding from its back, knees, fingers, and mouth. It's eyes were two hollow pits and it looked rather fierce to be in a children's coloring book. In fact, if it was meant to be a creature of the ice, it rather reminded Loki of something that might be found on Jotunheim.

"Marshmallow," Tova replied, coloring the spikes on the beast a turquoise color.

"That is not a marshmallow," Loki stated, having seen the squishy treats to which she referred, "That is… an ice monster of some sort, isn't it?"

"Uh huh. Her name's Marshmallow."

"Why would you name her that? She doesn't look anything like a marshmallow."

"I didn't name her!" Tova giggled, looking up and revealing she had food smeared on her cheeks. Loki grabbed a paper towel and cleaned off her face, an action he'd never have pictured himself doing in years past.

"Who did?"

"Uh… Olaf? Or maybe Elsa. Marshmallow is chasing Anna and Kristoff here!"

Recognizing the names from his chat with Cole Stark during Tova's Welcoming Ceremony, Loki nodded. It was evidently from the tale of _Frozen_ , which appeared to be a popular story with the children of Midgard.

"Then this Marshmallow thing is a minion of the villain, Prince Hans?"

"Pffft, no!" Tova went back to her coloring, "Marshmallow works for Elsa."

"But Elsa is one of the heroes, is she not?"

"Yeah! Elsa's my favorite, but I like Marshmallow too! My second favorite." The little girl was babbling away, "In the very, very, very end - past all the words - Marshmallow finds Elsa's old crown and puts it on and it makes her happy. I think she's a princess too."

"But she's a monster," Loki pointed out.

"Yup."

There was silence for a moment as Loki watched Tova color the ice beast in vibrant shades, then flip to the back of the coloring book where the was a sheet of stickers. She took a tiara shaped sticker and put it on Marshmallow's head with a triumphant grin.

"A crown does not make a monster any less frightening," Loki said, confused as to how Tova could like this spiky, frosty, angry looking thing almost as much as the glamorous Queen Elsa. It didn't make sense.

"She's not scary."

"But she clearly is, with all of those spikes."

"Okay, maybe a little scary," Tova conceded, and then giggled, "I was scared when I first saw her, but she's good."

"But-"

"She just needs love. Love thaws," the way she said it was so matter-of-fact that Loki couldn't find the words to argue with her. He simply watched as she flipped back to the sticker portion of the book and found a sticker of Marshmallow. She proceeded to peel it from the page, climb clumsily onto her uncle's lap, and slap the sticker to his chest.

"What is this for?" He asked, gingerly touching the small sticky image.

"It's for you!"

"I see that."

"To 'member that monsters are nice too," she gave the sticker another pat and then scrambled back over to her coloring, "Like you."

Loki looked around suspiciously to see if any of the Avengers or Thor had put the girl up to saying such a thing, but he could find no one and Tova turned the page to an image of a man in a long coat, asking Loki to help her color him and give him a mustache because this was Prince Hans and he was a big dumb-dumb. Loki, content that no one was trying to manipulate or make fun of him through the little girl, took the black crayon he was handed and gave Hans a mustache as requested.

That evening, when Loki was getting ready for bed, he found the sticker still attached to his shirt. He smiled softly at the picture of a giant ice monster. It was somewhat irritating to him that he was acting so foolishly over something as meaningless as a child's sticker. But he ignored the nagging in his head that this was weakness and he decided to stick it in the corner of the mirror that hung from his closet door. Where he'd see it whenever he saw his own face.

 **A/N: I'm pretty sure that** ** _Frozen_** **isn't quite as popular as it once was, and if this story is meant to take place a bit in the future I'm sure it shouldn't be referenced so much (although with** ** _Frozen 2_** **coming we might be going through a lot more of "Let it Go" in coming days). However, in my babysitting experience, there is no better way to have a meaningful conversation than to center it around a princess movie. So that's what happened here.**

 **Quick question: do any of you know any really good happy, sweet/bitter-sweet, feel good songs? I love listening to them while I write and read fluff. Like John Lennon's "Beautiful Boy" or Bruno Mars "Count on Me" or with the sound of The Beatles' "Dear Prudence". I'd love some suggestions if you have any! Thanks!**

 **And thank you so, so much for reading! I hope you are enjoying this fluff and I'd love it if you reviewed/followed/favorited! :)**


	19. Chapter 19

Tova was completely ready for her first day of kindergarten. She had a blue backpack with whales on it. She had pencils. She had crayons. She had a notebook with Elsa on it. She had a folder for homework that had Officer Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde on it. She had a special lunchbox with the Avenger's logo on it. She had pretty much everything she needed for a successful day of kindergarten. At least she was pretty sure she did. And Mommy seemed sure too, so it must be okay.

She gave Thor a big hug before she and Mommy left and she was surprised to see tears in his eyes.

"You have a good day," he instructed her, "Behave, listen to your instructor, be kind to others. Be safe. Have fun."

"I will, Thor!" She smiled and wiped the tears off his eyes, "Why are you crying?"

"You are just," he tried to smile too and fanned his face with the hand that was not holding Tova, "Sorry, you are just growing so quickly! It shall be any day now that you will be off to college and then moving out and having a family of your own perhaps!"

"Thor. I'm five."

"Indeed," he nodded with a chuckle, setting her down, "I love you, Tova."

"Love you!" She took Mommy's hand to walk out to the car, but right before they got to the door they heard the loud pounding of feet from upstairs and then frantic calls for them to wait. Tova grinned expectantly as Uncle Loki skidded down the stairs in his pajamas. She held her arms wide for a hug. In a shocking turn of events Loki did not even acknowledge her beyond a brief pat on the head. His attention was focused on Mommy.

"Jane, if you go to the store today, could you perhaps pick up some more shampoo?"

"Of course," Mommy nodded and tilted her head a little in Tova's direction. Tova held her arms wide once more, certain that he'd give her a hug now. He did no such thing.

"Thank you, Jane. Have a pleasant day," Uncle Loki yawned and started to trudge back upstairs. Tova pouted and considered stomping her foot in protest, but last time she'd stomped her foot she'd put a hole through the floorboards and Thor had to pull her out. Besides, it would be better to let him realize later what a big event he was missing. If he felt bad enough about it maybe he'd agree to play a game with her all day tomorrow. Then again, this school business seemed to be an all day ordeal so perhaps he'd only be able to play in the evening. Still, she prefered to put him on a guilt trip.

"Let's go, Tova," Mommy said, tugging Tova out the door, "We don't want to be late."

When Mommy had successfully buckled Tova into her car seat and started to pull out of the driveway, Tova looked up at Loki's window and saw him glance out. She put on her saddest face and waved limply at him. She could see his eyebrows furrow as he waved back, but he didn't come rushing out to hug her as she assumed he would. Good. Let the guilt build up for a bit.

She waved once more and then Mommy hit the gas and they were on their way.

* * *

After seeing Tova wave so sadly from the departing car, Loki decided to ask Thor if there was anything wrong with the girl. He went back downstairs to find his brother, casually dressed, sitting on the couch, wiping tears from his eyes.

"Thor, why are you crying?"

"I'm not crying!" Thor sniffled mightily and sat up straight, "You're crying."

"What's wrong?"

Loki regretted asking when more tears poured out of Thor's eyes and the big Asgardian ran to him and gave him a hug. Something was definitely up.

"Is Tova sick? Is she being taken away to be treated for some deadly illness?" Loki asked worriedly, all while patting Thor awkwardly on the back.

"She's, she's _growing up!_ " Thor blubbered.

"Yes, most people do."

"Brother," Thor held Loki's shoulders and searched his face with bleary eyes, "What if Father is right?"

"About?"

"How Jane will be gone in the blink of an eye? How she will grow old and frail and I will remain the same? How she will _die_ someday and I shall wish I could as well?" Thor looked truly worried about this and Loki felt a pang of sympathy.

"Thor…"

"And now there is Tova to worry over as well! What if she does not gain an Asgardian lifespan, but withers and dies too?! What if I must watch my wife and daughter fade before my eyes while I remain the same?!"

The same thoughts had crossed Loki's mind from time to time. He would be sad when Jane died, he supposed, but it had never bothered him as much as he knew it would destroy his brother. The thought of Tova dying, on the other hand, made his gut clench and his heart hurt. He knew that he should not have gotten involved, but now that he was he couldn't stand the idea.

"I am sure that Tova will take after you. We have already seen that she heals much faster than a human and that she has incredible strength," Loki led Thor back to the couch and they both sat down, "She will be fine. And Jane will too. I doubt it will be hard for you to persuade Odin to bestow immortality-"

"You know that he cannot actually do that, right?"

"What?"

"He can give the Golden Apples away to increase lifespan, but he cannot actually make anyone immortal," Thor sniffed.

"And all my life I was told - nevermind. Perhaps he will give her one of the Apples. And if he doesn't we can simply wait until he is dead and give her one ourselves. It will all work out."

"Thank you, brother," Thor gave Loki another hug, "I apologize for 'freaking out' on you."

"Do not fret," Loki rolled his eyes, "Now what in the nine realms brought on this train of thought?"

"Ah well, with Tova off to her first day of kindergarten I feel that she is growing up far too fast," Thor looked down at his hands, "And then it occured to me that perhaps she is not growing faster than normal, but to someone as old as I am maybe her childhood will be gone in a blink. And then her adulthood as well and that's what got me thinking."

" _Today is Tova's first day of school?!_ " Loki yelped, jumping to his feet, "No wonder she looked so sad! I forgot to give her a hug and wish her well! Norns! I am the worst uncle of all time!"

"Do not worry, she will forgive you."

"No she won't, Thor, she's a five year old. She's going to hold it against me forever and always," Loki ran up the stairs and changed into suitable Midgardian clothing and then ran back down, "Quickly! Take me to her school so that I may apologize!"

"Now?"

"Yes now! Let's go!"

"Very well… ah, but Jane took the van. We have no way to get to the school."

"Flying, duh?" Loki said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "Come on, oaf, get Mjolnir and let's get going!"

"You want me to carry you?"

"Oh," Loki hadn't quite thought this through. When Thor had first been given Mjolnir they'd gone for flights with Loki dangling from Thor's freehand, but that was always against Loki's will. It was the most undignified mode of travel.

"Hey boys!" Darcy's high pitched voice called as she threw open the front door and plopped down on the couch next to Thor, "Where's Tovie? Isn't today her first day of school?"

"She has already gone," Thor replied.

"What?!" Darcy sat bolt upright, "I am the worst aunt of all time!"

"Loki said something similar a few moments ago," Thor chuckled, "Honestly, it is just school. She will have another day of it tomorrow."

"You missed her too?" Darcy demanded, spinning and pointing at Loki so quickly she nearly fell over.

"Yes, we were trying to think of a way to get to the school so that I might wish her well," Loki grinned, "Of course now that you are here I will be commandeering your vehicle."

Darcy's keys were taken from her hands by the trickster and he dangled them far out of her reach, which wasn't hard given her lack of height and his excess of it.

"Oh heck no!" She yelped, jumping to try and get the keys, "I'm not letting you drive Brittany, you don't even have a learners permit!"

"Who is Brittany?" Loki asked, snidely.

"The car," Thor and Darcy replied in unison.

"Why can't we just all three go? I can at least drive and I want to go too!"

"I have already said my goodbye and shed my tears," Thor said, "You two may go but I will stay here."

"Fine," Loki tossed the keys back at Darcy and they landed on the rim of her glasses, "Let's go already."

* * *

"Mailbox! Mailbox! Darcy there is a blasted mail- well I hope that person is not expecting any important post today," Loki winced as they plowed down the third mailbox of this outing.

"Whoops," Darcy got the car more onto the road and things went more smoothly until they came to a crosswalk, "Aw crap, children!"

"Daaaaaaarcy!" Loki screamed, "The brakes! Hit the brakes!"

"Aaaaaaaaaah!"

"Braaaaaaaakes!"

They swerved at the last second and went around the oblivious line of youngsters and the furious crosswalk guard. Darcy rolled down the window and shouted her apologies, but they were already too far away for it to be heard.

They screamed their way through two more stoplights, a roundabout, and a closing railway crossing. Finally they got to the street the school was presumed to be on and Darcy slowed down to a normal speed limit. Loki was clinging to the dash for dear life and breathing hard. Darcy started to hum a catchy tune as they gently pulled into a parking spot. Loki had to pry his fingers out of the holes they'd made in the dash before he could exit the car.

"I take back every positive thought I have ever had about your driving," he snarled, "Thor is definitely a better driver than you are!"

"Sometimes he is," Darcy admitted, "But when I have passengers I am the better driver. Like if Tova was in the car we would have been following all the rules of the road."

"You _had_ a passenger!" Loki pointed at himself.

"Oh, I mean passengers that I care about."

"Darcy Lewis I ought to-"

"Ooh look! I bet that's the window to the kindergarten classroom! It has little butterflies all over and a 'Welcome New Students' sign! How cute!"

They made their way to the window and peered in. They weren't trying to be, but they definitely looked insanely creepy, looking into the kindergarten classroom's window. Loki was glowering in his usual fashion and Darcy full on pressed her face up against glass, trying to get a glimpse inside.

Children started screaming, laughing, and pointing. One boy wet himself and another threw a notebook at the window. The teacher stood up and strode over to the window. She hastily pulled the blinds and yelled at them to get away before she called security.

"Rude," Darcy muttered, leaving her position at the window and heading for the front door. Loki followed without question and when they got inside there was a receptionist who glared at them with a steely gaze. She looked to be about a hundred years old and if the Avengers had put her face at the front of their defence Loki would have never even tried to mess with them those years ago. Moving her lips in a disapproving fashion, the woman scratched her long nails on her desk and continued to glower at them.

"Hi!" Darcy greeted cheerfully, "We're here to say hello and goodbye to our niece briefly and then we'll be out of here. Could you tell us-"

"No."

"What?"

"Get lost."

"We need to speak to our niece," Loki said, "She is in the youngest grade."

"Let me ask the principal if you can wait in the office-" The woman turned to an intercom and her hand hovered a few centimeters above the "speak" button. She took a deep breath and without ever pushing the button, started speaking, "Hey, would it be alright if some unidentified weirdos who just walked in went into the kindergarten classroom and terrify the children?"

"You didn't push the-"

"Shush!" The woman snapped. She covered her mouth with her hand and put on a cackly voice, "No, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," the hand came down and hovered over the button again, "Oh, okay, you're right."

"But you didn't-"

"The answer is no. Leave before I call security."

Darcy was about to call the lady a not very nice name, but a herd of second graders was walking past right at that moment. She settled on huffing loudly, grabbing Loki's hand, and dragging him out of the building.

"A lot of help you were!"

"What did you want me to do?" Loki asked, "Use magic on her?"

"Duh! You could have made us look like Thor and Jane or something!"

"Now, I know you and I do not spend a lot of time together," Loki rolled up his sleeve to show her the magic inhibiting cuff, "But you should at least know that I can't _do_ magic!"

"Well then what good are you?!"

"What good are you?!"

"I drove us here! It's your turn to contribute something to this plan!"

"You call _that_ driving? I could have done better with my eyes closed!"

"Let's just focus on Tova, okay?" Darcy crossed her arms and jutted out her bottom lip in a pout. Anyone else would have found it endearing, but Loki just rolled his eyes, grabbed her arm, and pulled her around to the back to the school where there was a fenced in playground. He pointed at a group of kids and looked at her expectantly.

"What?"

"Children."

"Yeah, so? We aren't just looking for any child, Loco, we're looking for the sweetest child in the entire universe," Darcy said.

"These are the children that passed us inside. They came out of their classroom and are now here. Do the children periodically rotate the time they play outside or not?"

"They do, so?"

"Norns, I can see why Thor likes hanging out with you so much-"

"My charming personality?"

"Your stupidity makes him look almost smart by comparison."

"Hey!"

"If the children rotate shifts outside then Tova's class will be here at some point. We just have to wait. And when she comes we call her name, she comes over, we apologize and give her a hug each, and then send her back to play with the dozens of friends she's made by now."

"That's not a bad idea, Loco!" Darcy gave him a light punch on the arm with a huge smile, which faded in a moment, "'Cept we can't just hang around a kid's playground. We'll look like total creeps!"

"That's true," Loki wished for the millionth time since coming to Midgard that he had his magic back. Magic made everything so much easier. Still he could be crafty, "But I've a good plan. See that man over there?"

"The guy trimming the hedges?"

"The very one."

"What about him?"

"He has a partner who just walked around the side of the school. Now, they are both wearing uniforms, are they not?"

"Yeah…"

"And no one suspects them because of this."

"Yeah, cuz their gardeners. They're paid to be here."

"What if we were also to look like gardeners?"

"Good idea! Then no one would be thinking we are weirdos! But how do we get uniforms? You can't magic us some."

"Do you happen to have your infamous taser on you?"

"Yes- _no!"_

"Yes or no?"

"Yes I have it on me, but no way am I letting you use it on those two gardeners!"

"Why not? It will knock them out and then we can have their outfits."

"Because they look ancient! It could kill them!"

"And here I thought you were the fun one out of Thor's Earth friends," Loki scoffed.

"For your information, I am the fun one. But manslaughter isn't fun!"

"Pssh, says you," Loki muttered, "Alright, I'll _persuade_ them to give us their work clothes. Work for you?"

"As long as you don't hurt them I'm cool with whatever."

"Excellent. Wait here."

Darcy waited, foot tapping impatiently. She had no idea what Loki did to get the gardeners to hand over their uniforms, but he came back five minutes later with both pairs of coveralls in hand. Darcy yanked hers over her clothes and Loki did the same - though his was a bit short in the legs and arms. They picked up hedge trimmers and started to hack away at the bushes while they waited for the kindergarten class to come out for recess. Neither said a word.

And hour went by and the bushes had been mutilated beyond repair. Both fake gardeners rejoiced when they saw the kindergarteners walk out onto the playground along with the first graders. They threw the hedge trimmers behind the stubby bushes and ran over to the fence. Tova spotted them immediately and they waved with great enthusiasm.

The little girl stared at them for a few seconds, stuck out her tongue and went to play on the swing. Loki and Darcy both took a moment to process what had just happened and their grins slipped from their faces. Tova was completely ignoring them now, and pretty much everyone else on the playground. She just swung back and forth looking downtrodden.

"She hates us," Darcy breathed.

"She doesn't hate us," Loki sneered, but there was a hint of worry to his tone, "She's just being difficult."

"But I feel terrible! I want to make it up to her!"

"Tova is a crafty five year old," Loki commented, watching his niece play, "She knows the best way to get us to do whatever she wants is to act like we've wounded her. Let's start to walk away."

"But-"

"Just to see if it works," Loki turned and started heading back to the bushes. Darcy followed and they heard the squeaky chains of one of the swings stop. There was the thunderous sound of Tova running through wood chips and then a quiet plea.

"Wait!"

Neither Darcy nor Loki turned to look at her.

"Loki! Darcy! Wait!"

They finally turned.

"Oh hello, Tova!" Loki said, pretending to have just noticed her, "How are you this fine morning?"

"Good," Tova clung to the chain link fence that divided them, pressing her chubby face into it, "You guys didn't say bye to me!"

"We know, sweetie!" Darcy cracked, "And we are so, so, so, so sorry!"

"That's why we are here," Loki said, "To say hello and goodbye."

"Oh," Tova looked slightly disappointed that she wouldn't be able to emotionally manipulate them into playing with her and doing whatever she wanted, but she seemed happier that they'd made an effort.

"How is school?" Loki asked, crouching down next to her.

"Fun!" Tova exclaimed, "I already know everything!"

"Is that so?"

"I can already count to a hundred. I already know how to write all the letters. This is easy!"

"Excellent," Loki smirked, "You are obviously the smartest child in your class."

"How about friends?" Darcy asked, crouching down also, "Have you made any friends?"

"Um," Tova looked a little awkward at this, "There is a Guinea Pig in our classroom!"

"That's nice-"

"His name is Wilbur!"

"That's great!" Darcy said, "But what about-"

"That's them there! They were the ones staring into my classroom this morning!" The kindergarten teacher yelled and two burly security guards started toward Darcy and Loki.

"That's our cue to go," Loki winced, "Farewell Tova, have a wonderful day!"

"Bye-bye Tovie! You're the best!"

"Bye!"

Loki and Darcy shed their costumes as they ran toward the parking lot. Loki chucked them back at the pursuing security guards, hitting them right in the faces. That slowed the guards long enough for Darcy and Loki to hop in the car and tear out of the parking lot. They probably should have stayed and explained the situation to the guards, but neither of them was used to doing things that made much sense, so they decided running was their best option.

They laughed for part of the way home, until Darcy's driving got crazy again and Loki was screaming instead.

 **A/N: Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it! :) I had a lot of fun writing it!**


	20. Chapter 20

"This is pure Midgardian nonsense," Odin grumbled, picking at his disguise, "Remind me why the rulers of the Realm Eternal have disguised themselves in such ridiculous costumes?"

"You old grouch!" Frigga clucked, reaching over and straightening his cloth eyepatch, "We are here to see our darling grandchild perform in the art of ballet. I have heard it is a most prestigious dance form that is held in great reverence by the Midgardians."

"Fine," Odin grumbled, not admitting that he was excited to see his little granddaughter for the first time in several years, "But why the foolish costumes?"

"If we were to show up in true Asgardian garb we would outshine those on stage. Besides, we do not want the Midgardian authorities angered at us for causing a scene."

Odin looked in a mirror that they passed in the corridor of the performance hall. He was wearing a white shirt with thin, blue, vertical stripes on it. The shirt buttoned up and was partially covered by a beige blazer with tweed patches on the elbows. He was wearing beige pants as well and they were held up by suspenders. His hair was neatly combed back and his head was covered by a paperboy hat that he kept adjusting, wishing it looked more regal.

Frigga was wearing a lovely floral patterned dress with a chunky sweater over top. She had on sensible dress shoes and a pair of golden glasses hung from a chain around her neck. Her long hair was done up on top of her head in a massive bun. Somehow she still managed to look like a queen, while Odin was feeling rather frumpy in his Midgardian clothes.

They walked along with the throng of other attendees of the performance. Parents, grandparents, friends, and teachers all headed for the auditorium. They were last to get to the doors to the room as Frigga insisted that the elderly on Midgard walked much slower than they would. By the time they got to the door someone else opened it.

"Ah Loki!" Frigga exclaimed softly, with a smile on her face as her second son poked his head out into the hall. He took a moment to take in their appearance and Odin made sure to give a glare that made it clear he would not tolerate any remarks on their clothing.

"Mother, Thor didn't say you would be coming," Loki smiled at Frigga and ignored Odin all together, "How wonderful. Tova will be pleased, I am sure."

"I doubt she even remembers us. The last time we saw her she was only a year old," Odin grumbled.

"You look well, darling," Frigga squeezed Loki's shoulder, "And the Warriors Three say you seem happy here. Is that true?"

Loki regarded Odin warily, as if he thought Odin would force him back to Asgard the moment he said he was happy. Odin internally scoffed at the idea. He wasn't heartless. Of course, he didn't want Loki enjoying himself too much. He was still on probation.

"It is… decent," the younger man finally answered, "I have no complaints."

"I am glad to hear it," Frigga beamed, linking her arm with Odin's again, "Would you mind terribly if we were to sit with you to watch the performance?"

"Not at all," Loki opened the door for them and led them over to a row of seats in the theater room. Thor and Jane were already sitting with Darcy. The two women both had their phones trained on the stage, ready to start filming the moment Tova appeared. As he'd had nothing else to do, Steve Rogers was also in attendance, sitting next to Darcy and listening to her ramble on and on about something. Odin had never cared for Ms. Lewis, but he thought highly of the Captain.

The king and queen took their seats, with Odin next to Thor and Frigga next to Loki, who sat at the end of the row. Odin observed the other grandparents in the audience as they tried to figure out cameras and phones. The crumbling, aged Midgardians seemed to have lost some of their brain cells as they gained years. Weak.

"You will enjoy this, Mother," Loki said to Frigga, "She's been practicing every day for the past week and asks me to help her practice more every night."

"She must be the best out of her class," Frigga decided.

"Certainly!" Loki nodded and Odin was surprised to hear pride in his voice. Loki had never been the type to be proud of others, only seeing how their accomplishments outshone his own. Though, Odin supposed his second son did not feel too threatened by a dancing five year old.

After a few minutes of hushed conversation throughout the auditorium, the lights went down, the stage lights went up, and an older woman who had impeccable posture walked onto the stage with an ornate cane clicking along with her footsteps. She looked down her nose at the audience, even though the seats were arranged in such a fashion that most of the audience was looking down at her on the flat stage space. Here was an old Midgardian that was still sharp as a knife and Odin wondered what role she played in all of this.

"I am Madame Durand," the woman said in an accented voice, "Welcome to the performance. Tonight is a showcase of our younger level ballerinas and the skills they have been working on. We will start with the toddlers and work our way up to the eight year olds."

Gentle, happy music started playing and teachers led a train of children who were barely out of their infant days onto the stage.

"Without further ado," Madame Durand gestured grandly, "Our toddler class."

It was the most boring thing Odin had ever seen in his life. Babies stumbling around to happy classical music, some of them crying and trying to escape to their mothers. There were three who were following the movements of the teachers, but the rest seemed to be far more interested in running, screaming, and picking their noses - or each other's noses.

When the king glanced at his wife and sons, he saw they were also watching with glazed eyes. Loki even yawned audibly, causing some parents to glare at him. He only waved cheekily back. Odin turned back to the stage and saw that one of the three who had been following instructions was now spinning in endless circles. Another child approached and kicked the spinning one in the shins and they both fell over sobbing. The two that were still dancing paused. One of them went to try and cheer the cryers up and the other shrugged and kept dancing.

A little boy was gnawing on the curtains as a teacher tried to coax him to stop. A small girl kept snapping her leotard and giggling every time it hit her round tummy. Another boy was attempting a somersault while a girl helped him. The one that was still dancing, continued to dance, but was now screaming at the top of her lungs. The music sped up a bit and the teachers tried to get the kids to bow. A few did and then sprinted to their mothers, who waited with open arms.

For some reason, the audience applauded uproariously. Odin only shook his head.

"Thank you, toddler class," Madame Durand was back on stage and looking somewhat disappointed with the first act of the evening, "Next we move onto three and four year olds."

More small children, dressed in black and yellow stripes waddled on stage to a speedy song that reminded Odin somewhat of a pesky bee or insect. As the children all had fake wings on he supposed that must have been the point. These slightly older kids did far better at following the teacher's movements and only two of them stopped dancing entirely to stare blankly at the audience. And only one picked his nose, but he did so while continuing to dance. Odin was still bored, but at least these brats were doing what they were supposed to for the most part. Even if they were not in sync with one another at all.

Finally, it came time for Tova's age group of five and six year olds. The little girls and boys carefully stepped out onto the stage and once they were all in poses the music started with a force. They held their poses until the music calmed a little and became more playful. Odin looked at his fellow watchers and saw Darcy Lewis grinning.

"Sleeping Beauty Waltz," she whispered happily to Steve Rogers, "I danced to this when I was in ballet too!"

The children were still out of sync and Odin still found it boring. And, since they were all dressed the same and the girls all had their hair done the same and Odin had only seen photographs of Tova for the past four years, he had no idea which one was his granddaughter. Frigga seemed to know and she was nodding her head along to the music, whispering to him that their Tova was by far the most graceful of them all. Odin didn't want to disagree, but he honestly couldn't tell them apart. He just nodded sagely and muttered something vague and regal back to her.

He had to admit, however, that at the end of the song he knew exactly which one Tova was and he was greatly impressed. It seemed the choreographer had taken advantage of the half Asgardian girl's great strength and right at the end another little girl came running at her and Tova lifted her up by her waist, holding her above her head and smiling brightly at the audience. She stood on tiptoe and all the other dancers gestured (out of sync) at her. As the final notes sounded, Tova put down the other girl and they all bowed.

Odin joined in on the applause this time and chuckled to himself when Thor and Loki both stood and shouted their praise for the children. His sons were never lukewarm about their feelings for something. Frigga clapped elegantly and gave a little cheer as well, saying "well done Tova" in her lovely voice.

Then the Durand woman came back on stage and Loki and Thor both had to sit down and the next age group - seven year olds - began their dance. Odin tried not to snooze now that he was no longer kept awake waiting to see his granddaughter. He managed to get through the seven year olds and the eight year olds without incident. His eye started to drop a little when Madame Durand reminded the audience of upcoming ballet performances that her studio was putting on and he caught himself snoring slightly as flowers were given to all the teachers and the pianist. And then it was finally over.

The family made its way to the lobby of the building where all of the young ballerinas waited for them. Thor all but charged Tova and scooped her up into a hug. Jane was quick to follow, planting a huge kiss on the child's cheek. The parents told their daughter how proud they were of her and claimed that she'd done a marvelous job. Thor set her down again and gave her a pink rose that she smiled at and waved around as she explained how nervous she'd been and how much fun she'd had.

When the parents were done with her she ran straight to Loki and asked him how she did. Odin was surprised by this, but it did warm his old heart to see a glimpse of the man his son had once been.

"You know," Loki said thoughtfully, picking up the girl and balancing her on his hip - the rose hit him in the face a couple of times, but he patiently ignored it, "Your turns were a bit sloppy…"

"Really?"

"But otherwise you did perfectly. Why didn't you tell me you were doing that amazing lift at the end? That was fantastic!"

"It was a surprise! Madame Durand said not to tell anyone!"

"Ah but Tova!" Loki pouted, "I thought you always told _me_ your secrets!"

"It was a surprise!" She giggled, "Were you surprised?"

"Yes! And impressed!"

"Darcy, were you surprised?"

"Of course I was Tovie!" Ms. Lewis exclaimed, stealing the girl from Loki and blowing a raspberry on her forehead, "It was the most beautiful ballet I've ever seen! You did so good!"

"What do you say Tova?" Thor asked gently.

"Thank you, Darcy!"

"Of course!"

"Good job, Tova," Steve Rogers smiled and offered the little girl a handshake when Darcy put her back on the ground, "You're a better dancer than I am, that's for sure."

"Nuh uh!" Tova giggled.

"What do you mean?" Steve asked in confusion.

"'Cause you're the Star Spanky Man With a Pan!"

Steve immediately took on a deep shade of red and he turned to Darcy accusingly.

"Did you…?"

"My grandpa watched those shows when he was a kid," Darcy snickered, "Star Spangled Man With a Plan was what he played to put me to sleep whenever I stayed at his house."

"Don't tell Tony," Steve ordered.

"Too late!"

Odin ignored as the two of them discussed whatever in the nine realms they were discussing and approached Tova. Frigga had her hand resting in the crook of his elbow and she squeezed his arm tightly as they got closer to the little girl. The queen was nervous.

"I would like to congratulate you on a job well done, Tova," Odin said with a nod. The girl stared at him and smiled broadly.

"Thank you!" She looked like she was debating saying something, but finally let it spill out, "Mommy says I shouldn't point out when people have problems, but you are a pirate just like Nick Fury!"

"A pirate?" Odin asked, brow raised.

"I believe she means the eyepatch," Frigga chuckled, "It does look a tad piratical."

"You know who else has no eye?" Tova said, encouraged by Frigga's laugh, "My king grandfather! I saw a picture of him! He's got no eye, just like you!"

"That is because," Odin decided to be unkingly for a moment and crouched next to her, "I am your grandfather, sweet child. I am Odin."

Tova looked at him skeptically for a minute and then laughed.

"No!" She swung her arms, causing the rose to lose a few petals, "No, my grandfather is the king of Asgard. That's too far away for him to visit. My dad says so."

"Tova, dear," Thor bent down too, "This is Grandfather Odin. He and your Grandma Frigga have come to see you dance. Isn't that wonderful?"

"If he's a king," Tova jutted out her chin, "Where's his crown?"

"I had to leave it in Asgard," Odin replied with a slight smile, "It is terribly uncomfortable."

"And if you ask me," Frigga put a hand on her husband's shoulder, "He looks better without it."

"Are you really my grandparents?" Tova asked, squinting.

"Yes, dear," Frigga laughed.

"Cool!" She threw her arms around Odin's neck in a hug, "I love you!"

Everyone cooed at how adorable they thought this was and Odin had to agree there was something charming about a child he'd just met declaring she loved him. Then the girl let go and hugged Frigga's knees, declaring she loved her too. There was another round of "aws" and then Thor announced that they should go out to eat to celebrate Tova's performance.

Odin was not fond of being on Midgard and he was displeased with the food they got. He had been bored at the ballet performance and he didn't actually think Tova was all that good at dancing. He hated the clothing he was wearing and he felt like Loki was glaring at him the whole time they were eating.

Despite all of this, when Tova held his hand throughout the night and when she made him swear to visit soon right as he and Frigga were preparing to leave, he decided that he truly enjoyed his trip to Midgard.

 **A/N: Uh... yeah... it's, uh, been a while huh? Whoops. Sorry guys. Thank you so much for reading/following/favoriting/reviewing! It means a lot to me and hopefully you are all still enjoying this story! :)**


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